I just finished watching..........................

[dbsommer]

Decided to mix it up a bit with a short and a movie.

Read on: From Right to Left

Totally forgot about this, and I'm ashamed. It's brilliant work with two deranged looking puppets explaining something basic, and it has a fascination with palindromes. With that being said, I give credit to the creators by putting a bit of thought and effort into the skits. Vs. Playing with Clay or explaining how a Map works. That the short is all over the place lets the guys have some serious fun. This is a top tier short.

Highly Recommend.

And to the other side of the spectrum

Curse of Bigfoot

This movie really couldn't decide what it wanted to be. It's like five different terrible ideas jammed together. A movie within a movie. A pointless class teaching... I had no idea what was being taught. And some guy relating how he found, not big foot, but an indian mummy. No actors in this, not even a drunk Carradine. Poorly shot. Poorly scripted. It was just godawful, but not in a good way. There is some absurdity in the ineptitude, but it's tiring as well. This film has pretty much nothing happening in it for most of it. The guys did their best, but this is absolutely near the bottom of the list when it comes to purchases.

Not a recommend.

[Pak-Man]

Finally got around to Blood Theatre.

It's clear that Rick Sloane actually learned from making this movie. It still only got him as far as Hobgoblins, but Blood Theatre is even MORE amateurish. So many questions in the end. Was the villain a murderer, or was it ghosts, or was it a murderer ghost, or did ghosts and a murderer kinda team up to cause mayhem? Did Rick Sloane think we wouldn't believe there were ferns in the theater unless we saw them being meticulously installed?

But the biggest question I have- and this applies to Hobgoblins as well- does Rick Sloane know what sexy is supposed to look like? Looking at his IMDB page, you'd think he'd have some skill in that craft, but every attempt just falls so far off the mark. 

[dbsommer]

It's shorts time. Have a lot of them I haven't rewatched so I'm hitting a few of them.

Marriage is a Partnership

The ladies tackle this one. It's a good thing to since they come up with better stuff for more female oriented material like this. However the short itself is boring and mostly just a narrative. The ladies do a good job with a pretty bland short. Side note: The husband is the anti-Triple H. He feels guilty about being promoted after he marries the boss's daughter.

What Makes Things Float

Insert Caddyshack Baby Ruth scene. Sorry, I was young and sometimes when people talk about things floating, that's the go to thought.

The guys do a good job with this. They thrive on educational shorts, and there's actual a pretty explanation of water displacement in this. So I give the short a bit of credit as well as the jokes being good.

Dinosaurs, the Age of Terrible Lizards

One of the shortest they've done at under 7 minutes. It's cheaply done dinosaurs doing silly things since the budget is very limited. But it's dinosaurs, so the guys make it fun. Much more than the last Jurassic World movie.  Brief but good.

And for the gem in the bunch

The Clean Club

Okay, this was awesome in every way. It's a cleanliness short with stop motion animation germs. The things is, these folks put some effort into something with such a minimal budget. The animation looks nice. The character models have some effort put into them. Also we have inappropriately seductive talking household cleaning agents. Imagine Coiley with Kathleen Turner's sultry voice. Yes, the guys jump all over everything in this, and it works to perfection.

Highly recommend.

[dbsommer]

Teenage Space Vampires

Bridget and Mary Jo did a superlative job with this. It was so Romanian I thought the cast were turned from normal vampires into the space version. Likewise everyone is creepy even before they are changed. It was like they couldn't decide when the character should change, so just act like they were vampires the whole time. These ones function in daylight, and thus its weird when they grab someone in broad daylight where anyone can see since it should be giving them away. They aren't exactly subtle. As frequently with the genre, the big bad's plan doesn't make a whole lot of sense. He parks his spaceship out in the open next to a lot of houses. He'll only grab two out of three intruders, leaving one behind for no discernable reason. Luckily the heroes are lame to compensate for this.

Now there is more effort put into this than with Lycan Colony or its ilk. But aside from that it is sub par all the way through. And this gives the ladies a lot to work with in a genre they don't hit too often. They do make some fun callbacks to their Merry Higgens Clark work and what not. Definitely found it worthwhile.

[dbsommer]

Honor and Glory

Been so long since I've seen this I forgot everything about it. Which is actually cool since this felt like a new film, and what a great film it was. I mean this was a hot mess from start to finish. Martial arts mayhem abounds in near every scene, and even Kevin remarks when a can gets kicked it's the only thing that doesn't know any martial arts. The acting is atrocious. The plot ridiculous. Our villain is a buff Terry Silver who chews scenery the way the Guy From Harlem chews a tough well done steak. Riffing was on par, and I'm getting disturbed that whenever I see someone who reminds me of someone else, one of the guys will call it out later. I mean I guess 'Martial Arts Eddie Murphy' was kind of obvious since, in looking up the film, others thought the same thing. But when Not Andy Rictor is seen for only a second getting spun around, that is stretching it, they made the same call out I did.

Riffing is top notch. Just one step below the absurdity that is Death Promise, and much better than Honor and Glory 2. Highly recommend.

[Pak-Man]

Honor and Glory has one of my all-time favorite riffs. "I can't tell if everyone's forgotten their lines, or they just don't want to say them!"

[Iron Curtain]

Baby Ghost. I would honestly put this riff up there with R.O.T.O.R.. The movie was one of the most riffable movies they ever did, and boy were the riffs good!

[ihavemyreasons]

Atomic Eden
First 20 minutes made me think it was going to be a great low budget action flick (although I kept expecting to hear "You son of a bitch! I'm in!). It grew nonsensical from there. Entertaining enough as a movie and good riffing, but could have been a much better movie despite the wooden acting if someone would have thought the plot through a little bit better.
The Ukranian setting was good, but the nazi tunnel was a big let down - basically looked like an old trailer home with a swastica flag on the wall. And why when you finally open the secret safe do you stop at the envelope with the key and not search thr box and drawers inside. Sure, maybe the key was what was important, but wouldn't you want to make sure that nothing else important is there?

[dbsommer]

The Bermuda Triangle

This was an early one I picked up. I forgot a lot about it. And now I wonder if I was trying to erase an unpleasant experience. This movie has a large cast that does nothing for the majority of the film. It kind of just lingers around and does nothing with the time. Nearly two hours of it. It's not really horror. It's not mysterious. It just plods along until the last half hour when everyone finally starts dying. You know how people complain about them cutting stuff from movies? This is the perfect example of a movie that should have been cut down. Want to watch people on a ship die and a cat within a cat? Go with The Uninvited long before this.

Not a recommend.

[stansimpson]

Game of Thrones: Rains of Castamere (aka The Red Wedding)

I loved watching GOT when it was on. The last season was flawed, but fans' overreaction really soured so much. Revisiting this ep, I forgot just how depressing it is. Glad I watched it right before going to bed, because I would probably just be depressed the rest of the day.

The riffs were enjoyable and funny. Like watching the show with some of your funniest friends. I still remember the best comment ever made about the episode (not from MK&B): "By Dothraki standards, this wedding wasn't a dull affair!"

I'm looking forward to my more light-hearted recent purchases like Charade, Gumby: The Movie, and Father Frost later. Good night!

[Pak-Man]

Checked out Dancin': It's On! last night and wow we have a special one here. It's probably not the worst thing they've ever done if you add up the sum of its parts, but it may very well be the stupidest. Even accounting for the fact that this movie was probably made for a younger crowd, it can't even stand up to the likes of Merlin: The Return or Fairy King of Ar. The acting is wooden and none of the actors have any chemistry, and so help me I think Twilight may have had a better romance. It is also completely bonkers, taking place in a universe where people just break out into dance numbers for whatever reason. My sides were aching at the end. This is one of the good ones.

[The Lurker]

Checked out Dancin': It's On! last night and wow we have a special one here. It's probably not the worst thing they've ever done if you add up the sum of its parts, but it may very well be the stupidest. Even accounting for the fact that this movie was probably made for a younger crowd, it can't even stand up to the likes of Merlin: The Return or Fairy King of Ar. The acting is wooden and none of the actors have any chemistry, and so help me I think Twilight may have had a better romance. It is also completely bonkers, taking place in a universe where people just break out into dance numbers for whatever reason. My sides were aching at the end. This is one of the good ones.

People put a lot of emphasis on the weird lyrics, but one of the things that sticks with me sometimes is David Winter's awkward "You can't play dance" line.

[Pak-Man]

Checked out Dancin': It's On! last night and wow we have a special one here. It's probably not the worst thing they've ever done if you add up the sum of its parts, but it may very well be the stupidest. Even accounting for the fact that this movie was probably made for a younger crowd, it can't even stand up to the likes of Merlin: The Return or Fairy King of Ar. The acting is wooden and none of the actors have any chemistry, and so help me I think Twilight may have had a better romance. It is also completely bonkers, taking place in a universe where people just break out into dance numbers for whatever reason. My sides were aching at the end. This is one of the good ones.

People put a lot of emphasis on the weird lyrics, but one of the things that sticks with me sometimes is David Winter's awkward "You can't play dance" line.

My wife and I have been quoting that at each other all day.

[Darth Geek]

Checked out Dancin': It's On! last night and wow we have a special one here. It's probably not the worst thing they've ever done if you add up the sum of its parts, but it may very well be the stupidest. Even accounting for the fact that this movie was probably made for a younger crowd, it can't even stand up to the likes of Merlin: The Return or Fairy King of Ar. The acting is wooden and none of the actors have any chemistry, and so help me I think Twilight may have had a better romance. It is also completely bonkers, taking place in a universe where people just break out into dance numbers for whatever reason. My sides were aching at the end. This is one of the good ones.

People put a lot of emphasis on the weird lyrics, but one of the things that sticks with me sometimes is David Winter's awkward "You can't play dance" line.

My wife and I have been quoting that at each other all day.

That line is hilarious! And doubly so because not only is it so stupid, but you just know the writer thought it was brilliant when he thought of it. 

[dbsommer]

Rifftrax Presents: Snowbeast

Just got my Friends subscription through the MST kickstarter and am trying to make the most of it. So I'm hitting some stuff I overlooked and this is the Britrrax duo. This one was a good one. It's in the vein of other 'monster in the middle of small rural place' movies, like Grizzly, Day of the Animals (hotshot), and Winterbeast (no relation to this movie. Since either there was no winterbeast, or everyone was a winterbeast in that one)

This was definitely one of the best Britrax out there. Matt and Ian have good chemistry, but they really shine if the material works with them with their style of comedy. This one does. Snowbeast is a great vehicle and genre lesser used so you've heard the type of jokes that go with it not as frequently. They never let up, and the movie gives them plenty to work with. I'll add it is a competently made for TV movie, which makes it a step above a lot of the more amateurish stuff. Like anything Joe Estevez pops up in.

Recommend.

Now for the exact opposite.

Rifftrax Presents: Flash Gorden:PDFOS

I can keep this brief. The movie is so disjointed due to it being a compacted serial it's terrible. I mean really, really bad, and not in a Rifftrax can save it way. The editor was surely a chimp on meth hitting buttons at random. Imagine watching a movie but hitting scene skip every 30 seconds. Yes, it's that bad. Because of this there is no flow to the jokes because there is no flow to the movie. It really is a bottom tier one. The Brits can't save it. I doubt anyone could. Misses are rare, but this is one of them.

Do not pay for this. Only watch it if you don't feel like watching something else. Like paint drying.

Not a recommend.

D-Wars

It's kind of a monster movie. Kind of a sword and sorcery movie. Kind of a romance. Kind of an Asylum type rip off not done by the Asylum. It's all over the place and thus has no idea of what it wants to be. It was like three scripts mashed into one. So it is coherent, but all over the place. The riffing is solid. The film is bad but watchable. It's a weird sort of bad, though. I found myself entertained and amused while watching it, but also I won't remember a thing about it either. I can't recall any of the lines.

Thus I give it a middle of the road sticker. Strictly average, which happens sometimes because most people aren't hitting home runs so often that's the average. Worth watching, but there are a lot better things out there.