Tweeters Never Prosper

[Johnny Unusual]

@pattonoswalt

"Oh SURE we'll legalize gay marriage! *snort* *chuckle* Right after IRELA...oh shit."

-- The U.S. Supreme Court

[Miku Fan]

25 bucks for that?  The stripes aren't even right! 

[Johnny Unusual]

@saladinahmed
When you finally come up with a good crack involving the word 'bonehead,' but it's 6 hours after you fought Skeletor.

[Darth Geek]

@marsjpg

you can't be annoyed at feminism being called feminism when the entire history of the human race is called mankind

[Johnny Unusual]

Piers Morgan writes that I didn't recognise him in a restaurant in New York.I did.I just didn't want to speak to someone I truly detest

@JohnCleese

[Johnny Unusual]

Just read the comics for the first time in ages. Man, Dilbert does NOT like Mondays. And he looks more like a cat than I remember. #LSSC

@stephenathome

[The Lurker]

@AwfulFantasy

"'Gather 'round! Sit Orc-style upon the dirt as I sing my tales. And don't be so Elfy about it,' sang Feru, the politically incorrect bard."

[Darth Geek]

@TheSpoonyOne

I will now blow your mind:
Rufus is a regeneration of the Master out to disrupt Earth's utopian future by handing a TARDIS off to 2 idiots.

[Darth Geek]

@FrankConniff

Trumpy, you can run stupid campaigns!

[Johnny Unusual]

‏@StephenAtHome
Fun Fact! Techno music got its name because it is technocally music

[Darth Geek]

@LOLGOP

The people who are offended by "Happy Holidays" want to know what your problem with the Confederate flag is.

[Darth Geek]

@FrankConniff

Obamacare is not a cure-all for healing the body. In the case of Antonin Scalia, it's causing great pain to an asshole.

[Darth Geek]

@paulandstorm

[P] I JUST MARRIED A CONFEDERATE FLAG

YOUR MOVE LIBTARDS

[Darth Geek]

@jamesgunn

My 2nd favorite thing as a director is creating an emotional moment of truth between 2 actors. My 1st favorite is lighting someone on fire.

[Darth Geek]

@joedator

I met a woman who had never heard the term "mansplaining". Now, I am faced with a dilemma.