Autobots! Tells us what you have learned!

[Bob]

what the hell?! my post got classified as spam and there's no links or pictures in it! it's just text!

Shodan = Fraking Spambot

[Danecho1967]

I also learned that it's possible to make a movie that is worse than Transformers 2, that John Malkovich and Frances McDormand will do anything for a paycheck and that it was actually possible for me to hate Michael Bay more than I already did.

And John Turtoro too.    Man....

Yeah, but we found that out with the first one.  At least he didn't drop his pants for no reason in this one.  (That's not saying much, I know.)

[Bob]

I also learned that it's possible to make a movie that is worse than Transformers 2, that John Malkovich and Frances McDormand will do anything for a paycheck and that it was actually possible for me to hate Michael Bay more than I already did.

And John Turtoro too.    Man....

Yeah, but we found that out with the first one.  At least he didn't drop his pants for no reason in this one.  (That's not saying much, I know.)

Talk about setting the bar low 

I need to watch Millers Crossing to get that taste out of my mouth.

[D.B. Barnes]

I learned that this might be the most expensive, intelligence-insulting piece of shit ever made (since Transformers 2.) These movies make Episode I look like a cinematic masterpiece.

Fuck this movie and everybody in it. You're all horrible people who have exposed yourselves as the egregious cash whores that you are. Sleep the sleep of heroin-soaked whores on your piles of money.

And an extra-special fuck you to Ken Jeong. I didn't like you all that much in the first place. You're a bit of a one-note hack and you're the least talented, most disposable character on Community. It's no wonder they're using you less-and-less. But this? If I had even a shred of respect for you as a performer, it's gone. This was perhaps the most horrible, revolting, and nauseating performance I've ever seen. You managed to make La Beef look measured and dignified. That is an unheard of feat of ass-hattery of the highest degree. And you were onscreen all of ten minutes! La Beef was in almost every single minute of the movie and all of that put together couldn't even come close to the vomit-inducing levels of annoyance you flung at the screen in the short time before you perished. Never before have I been so happy to see a character die. You're fucking dead to me, you clown.

And Michael Bay? I hope a pack of Canis lupus have non-censual, forcible intercourse with you until your body ceases to function and you expire.

[Danecho1967]

I learned that this might be the most expensive, intelligence-insulting piece of shit ever made (since Transformers 2.) These movies make Episode I look like a cinematic masterpiece.

Fuck this movie and everybody in it. You're all horrible people who have exposed yourselves as the egregious cash whores that you are. Sleep the sleep of heroin-soaked whores on your piles of money.

And an extra-special fuck you to Ken Jeong. I didn't like you all that much in the first place. You're a bit of a one-note hack and you're the least talented, most disposable character on Community. It's no wonder they're using you less-and-less. But this? If I had even a shred of respect for you as a performer, it's gone. This was perhaps the most horrible, revolting, and nauseating performance I've ever seen. You managed to make La Beef look measured and dignified. That is an unheard of feat of ass-hattery of the highest degree. And you were onscreen all of ten minutes! La Beef was in almost every single minute of the movie and all of that put together couldn't even come close to the vomit-inducing levels of annoyance you flung at the screen in the short time before you perished. Never before have I been so happy to see a character die. You're fucking dead to me, you clown.

And Michael Bay? I hope a pack of Canis lupus have non-censual, forcible intercourse with you until your body ceases to function and you expire.

Truer words have never been written.  I, and the movie viewing world, thank you.

[Darth Geek]

I learned that this might be the most expensive, intelligence-insulting piece of shit ever made (since Transformers 2.) These movies make Episode I look like a cinematic masterpiece.

Fuck this movie and everybody in it. You're all horrible people who have exposed yourselves as the egregious cash whores that you are. Sleep the sleep of heroin-soaked whores on your piles of money.

And an extra-special fuck you to Ken Jeong. I didn't like you all that much in the first place. You're a bit of a one-note hack and you're the least talented, most disposable character on Community. It's no wonder they're using you less-and-less. But this? If I had even a shred of respect for you as a performer, it's gone. This was perhaps the most horrible, revolting, and nauseating performance I've ever seen. You managed to make La Beef look measured and dignified. That is an unheard of feat of ass-hattery of the highest degree. And you were onscreen all of ten minutes! La Beef was in almost every single minute of the movie and all of that put together couldn't even come close to the vomit-inducing levels of annoyance you flung at the screen in the short time before you perished. Never before have I been so happy to see a character die. You're fucking dead to me, you clown.

And Michael Bay? I hope a pack of Canis lupus have non-censual, forcible intercourse with you until your body ceases to function and you expire.

Truer words have never been written.  I, and the movie viewing world, thank you.

Seconded. I can see why some people say that this is the best of the three (even those who admit it being a low fucking bar), but I still can't distinguish between the second one and the third one very much.

[Lemming Howard]

I can't believe we spent this much time posting about a single line in f**king Bay Transformers movie!!

The line in question was from Cronkite.  I think it was taken out of context and used to explain the hidden excursion the astronauts took to explore the crashsite,   Uncle Walter probably was referring to the orbiting Apollo 11 Capsule moving behind the farside of the moon.  Don't know if communications between the LEM and Earth was via the Apollo 11.  And who cares.

[Trekker4747]

I learned that this might be the most expensive, intelligence-insulting piece of shit ever made (since Transformers 2.) These movies make Episode I look like a cinematic masterpiece.

Fuck this movie and everybody in it. You're all horrible people who have exposed yourselves as the egregious cash whores that you are. Sleep the sleep of heroin-soaked whores on your piles of money.

And an extra-special fuck you to Ken Jeong. I didn't like you all that much in the first place. You're a bit of a one-note hack and you're the least talented, most disposable character on Community. It's no wonder they're using you less-and-less. But this? If I had even a shred of respect for you as a performer, it's gone. This was perhaps the most horrible, revolting, and nauseating performance I've ever seen. You managed to make La Beef look measured and dignified. That is an unheard of feat of ass-hattery of the highest degree. And you were onscreen all of ten minutes! La Beef was in almost every single minute of the movie and all of that put together couldn't even come close to the vomit-inducing levels of annoyance you flung at the screen in the short time before you perished. Never before have I been so happy to see a character die. You're fucking dead to me, you clown.

And Michael Bay? I hope a pack of Canis lupus have non-censual, forcible intercourse with you until your body ceases to function and you expire.

Can't really disagree with any of this.  Ken Jeong's "character" was just... WTF?  I mean sipping on the juice box, that whole deal in the stall.  Has any person on the face of the planet EVER acted like that?

And John Malkovich playing grab-ass with Bumblebee was probably the saddest thing ever.

[Darth Geek]

And John Malkovich playing grab-ass with Bumblebee was probably the saddest thing ever.

Yeah, that was "I suffer without my stone" level bad.

[turbospaz3000]

i learned how much more these movies suck without being able to at least check out megan fox. that blonde bimbo is alright, but aint anywhere near the bimbo megan fox is. megan fox looks like she would do bad things to you. bad in a good way. without her, these movies are utterly worhtless.

[ScottotD]

I haven't listened to the riff but I'm curious about the percentage of actual jokes vs. going on and on about Shia and/or army characters saying 'go' repeatedly.

[D.B. Barnes]

I haven't listened to the riff but I'm curious about the percentage of actual jokes vs. going on and on about Shia and/or army characters saying 'go' repeatedly.

Once the action gets going, there are tons of 'go' riffs. Pretty much wall-to-wall. You'd probably hate it.

[ScottotD]

I haven't listened to the riff but I'm curious about the percentage of actual jokes vs. going on and on about Shia and/or army characters saying 'go' repeatedly.

Once the action gets going, there are tons of 'go' riffs. Pretty much wall-to-wall. You'd probably hate it.

yeah, I haven't seen the movie either but I sort of assumed both would be pretty predictable.  Oh well, Warriors of the Wasteland it is

[shodan]

michael bay can make a double bladed buster sword look lame.