Horror Movie a Day: October 2011

[shodan]

I was also thinking of trying to watch the original, non-mst3k version of manos but I don't think i'd be able to get through it. I tried one of the Leprechaun movies too just to see if i'd be interesting in watching it but it was just too bad.

[D.B. Barnes]

<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1536044/">#5 PARANORMAL ACTIVITY 2</a>

I didn't hate this. I thought it was actually much better than the original. I think the movie benefited from having more characters involved. It creates little subplot diversions that make things a little more interesting. I found the main characters much less annoying than Captain Douche and Shrieking Bowl o' Jell-O from the first movie. The demon's actions seemed a little more intense and angry as well. It wasn't nearly as bad as I thought it would be so I came away somewhat pleasantly surprised. It's not good by any means, but it's not terrible. My major annoyance is with the repeated surveillance camera views. Hey, there's the foyer again!

GRADE: C+

[SJP]

I sort of feel the same way about the Paranormal Activity films.  When stuff is happening, I think it's done effectively.  Unfortunately, I personally feel that there's a difference between a slow build and stuff never happening.  Stuff DID happen in the first one...I think a lot of the second one focuses on stuff NOT happening.  Granted, as mentioned, when it does happen, it's not bad, but when your movie is barely 80 minutes long and about forty of it those are suspense filler, it gets old.

I will say the same thing annoys me in movies I like, too.  There's only so many times you can watch someone creep down a hallway towards a door before you start going, "Just eat them already!  We know the monster's going to be behind them after the cat jumps out and scares them, just get to the spine-ripping!"  Even The Thing (1982) is guilty of this, especially in the lengthy helicopter scene fly-bys, and I honestly and dearly love that movie.

But back on track, Movie 6: The Monster Maker.  A public domain cheapie, and by cheapie, I'm not kidding; the production studio was well-known in its day for farting stuff like this out.  The basic plot is a mad scientist is in the verge of curing a condition known as acromegaly, which causes swelling in the extremities and head (it's real, but nowhere near as weird-looking as they make it look in the movie).  The scientist's wife died as a result of the disease, and he's spent years looking for a cure.  Then, he meets the daughter of a world-class pianist, who looks exactly like his dead wife (and he's got his wife's senior graduation photo to prove it).  He seeks to marry her, despite her attempts to inform him that he's weird, gross, and obsessive, and he responds by injecting her father with a virus that causes acromegaly and refuses to cure him until the daughter marries him.  Oh, and did I mention the scientist has a rather attractive assistant that loves him dearly and ISN'T about twenty years too young for him?  Ah, well.  If mad scientists made good decisions, we wouldn't have horror movies.

Is it good?  No...but it is the kind of awesome, USDA-Select Grade B fodder for a VOD iRiff.  If I don't get to it first, someone ought to.  The villain is hammy, the plot is ridiculous, and there's an unexplained gorilla in the laboratory.  What's not to like?

[Compound]

Black Christmas

Really sucks. Seriously. The original was marginally entertaining, but there's little to recommend about the remake. Well, the cast is great, but the script doesn't give them anything to work with. Pass on it.

And no, I'm not just posting this to knock Schmooze's stuff off the top spot.

[Russell]

Santa's slay - Bill Goldberg is an evil santa who murders people, including
Fran Drescher(So I guess some people might object to him being called evil)
and meanwhile two young kids fall in love and meanwhile there are a lot of
bad effing puns and a lot of pseudo-swearing like a-hole and effing, you
know, as most retards like to do.

[dignan]

Day 6: Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives

Hugely entertaining entry for this series.  On its own, it probably wouldn't rank as a particularly great horror movie or anything, but watching it hard on the heels of other Friday the 13th movies helps to strengthen its position as one of the better installments.  I particularly enjoy Horshak getting his heart ripped out.

[gojikranz]

well i am way behind but ill pick it up tommorrow when i hit up a triple feature featuring Joe Dante's new movie.

anyways the other night me and a friend watched bikini girls on ice on netflix streaming. 

major turd.  thats all i will say.

[Artie]

Movie for the 6th was The Howling Reborn.  Rather bland werewolf movie with terrible werewolf costumes, but it does have Lindsey Shaw so it ended up being watchable.

[shodan]

7th movie was uncle sam a 4th of july themed horror movie. was ok, worth a watch.

[Relaxing Dragon]

well i am way behind but ill pick it up tommorrow when i hit up a triple feature featuring Joe Dante's new movie.

If you're headed to Midnites for Maniacs, we're going to the same thing

Tonight's film:

Blood Diner. This little never-heard-of-it 80's horror/comedy was given to me by a buddy of mine, and I'm thankful for it. One of those movies that has zero pretension, zero convictions, and just enough budget to get crazy with the effects while still sticking strictly to super-indie town. Two brothers and the brain of their uncle (just the brain) conspire together to murder a bunch of young, promiscuous women, steal their organs, and try to raise an ancient pagan God to walk the earth. Basically all that's right in a movie from that decade, this is funny, gory, stupid, and downright enjoyable in just about every way. It's a little difficult to put it all into words, so I'll let this clip do it for me, since it about sums the movie up: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7x2HOBZzq9g&feature=related

Yeah, I loved this movie. Also, one of the brothers sounds exactly like Mordecai from Regular Show, and now I can't help picturing that duo crossed over with this. Freaky.

Favorite Kill: Far and away the scene where one of the brothers slathers a very naked lady in batter, and then shoves her head in the deep fat fryer. The ordinary slasher would stop here, but not this one, oh no. She manages to push him off after a bit, and when she emerges, her head has turned into a giant, round, fried ball. She proceeds to run around, half-food, until the brother regains his composure and knocks her head off with a pan. It flies into the next room and lands by her friend (who's making out with the other brother). She doesn't notice. Brilliant.
Death Count: 35 (woo!), plus a whole lotta after-the-fact corpses from the massacre at the end.

[shodan]

well i am way behind but ill pick it up tommorrow when i hit up a triple feature featuring Joe Dante's new movie.

If you're headed to Midnites for Maniacs, we're going to the same thing

Tonight's film:

Blood Diner. This little never-heard-of-it 80's horror/comedy was given to me by a buddy of mine, and I'm thankful for it. One of those movies that has zero pretension, zero convictions, and just enough budget to get crazy with the effects while still sticking strictly to super-indie town. Two brothers and the brain of their uncle (just the brain) conspire together to murder a bunch of young, promiscuous women, steal their organs, and try to raise an ancient pagan God to walk the earth. Basically all that's right in a movie from that decade, this is funny, gory, stupid, and downright enjoyable in just about every way. It's a little difficult to put it all into words, so I'll let this clip do it for me, since it about sums the movie up: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7x2HOBZzq9g&feature=related

Yeah, I loved this movie. Also, one of the brothers sounds exactly like Mordecai from Regular Show, and now I can't help picturing that duo crossed over with this. Freaky.

Favorite Kill: Far and away the scene where one of the brothers slathers a very naked lady in batter, and then shoves her head in the deep fat fryer. The ordinary slasher would stop here, but not this one, oh no. She manages to push him off after a bit, and when she emerges, her head has turned into a giant, round, fried ball. She proceeds to run around, half-food, until the brother regains his composure and knocks her head off with a pan. It flies into the next room and lands by her friend (who's making out with the other brother). She doesn't notice. Brilliant.
Death Count: 35 (woo!), plus a whole lotta after-the-fact corpses from the massacre at the end.

holy crap i remember seeing that movie on FEARnet and thought it was awesome. thats gonna be my next movie now.

[gojikranz]

well i am way behind but ill pick it up tommorrow when i hit up a triple feature featuring Joe Dante's new movie.

If you're headed to Midnites for Maniacs, we're going to the same thing

oh ya.  does goonies count as a horror movie, maybe not...but i have got some catching up to do...

[Relaxing Dragon]

well i am way behind but ill pick it up tommorrow when i hit up a triple feature featuring Joe Dante's new movie.

If you're headed to Midnites for Maniacs, we're going to the same thing

oh ya.  does goonies count as a horror movie, maybe not...but i have got some catching up to do...

I don't think so, but The Hole definitely does, so you're set for tomorrow

[JimJ]

Wow, didn't expect to get my 100 kills tonight, but my 7th movie, Saw: The Final Chapter, is fucking loaded with bodies.  At least 26, that's insane!  I've seen it before, but didn't remember the body count being so high.  I'm glad I won't be counting bodies anymore.  As for the movie, it's one of my favorites in the series.  I really love the first trap, it was a nice change of scenery with it being out in public instead of in some abandoned building.  Of course, after that it goes back to the abandoned buildings but the other traps were pretty good too.  The one with the guy glued to the car seat makes me cringe, and I'm a pretty hardened gorehound.  Also, Costas Mandylor, besides having one of the coolest names ever, is my favorite part of this franchise.  The original Jigsaw is annoying, but Mandylor is a badass and I love him in this one. 4/5

Total deaths after 7 movies: 101 

[D.B. Barnes]

<a href="http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1161864/">#6 The Rite</a>

I had hopes when I found The Rite to be gracing my mailbox. I was disappointed when I found this to be an over-hyped piece of shit.

Let's get Hopkins to act in a number of situations, most of which I won't find all that horrific, or else be distracted by lame monster effects, don't know really. I was a little buzzed when I watched this, but it just seemed like a "Hey we've got Anthony Hopkins!" act-fest  that didn't quite make up for the thin premise. I didn't hate it, I didn't love it, but I was very aware of it.


GRADE: C+