Clearly the Greatest American Movie Ever Made

[BBQ Platypus]

I'd like to thank Mike Nelson for introducing me to this masterpiece of American cinema.  Since I purchased this movie and Rifftrax two months ago, I've watched it about three times with Rifftrax and once without.  With or without Rifftrax, it is the most fun, shirtless, and unapologetically awesome movie ever.  It's got everything:

- violence
- GRAPHIC violence
- gratuitous nudity
- gratuitous violence
- mullets
- Patrick Swayze
- Patrick Swayze WITH a mullet
- gratuitous nudity in scenes involving gratuitous violence
- redneck-y barroom roots rock
- rampant homoeroticism
- greasy shirtless chests
- greasy shirtless barfights
- a general propensity for greasy shirtlessness
- hilariously dumb philosophical mantras
- baffling lack of police officers
- a monster truck (sadly, it doesn't feature anybody turning INTO a monster truck -  just about the only thing that could've made this movie better)
- MORE violence
- MORE nudity
- Carrot Top isn't in it


It's as if Rowdy Harrington found a way to directly convert pure testosterone into film.  Mike Nelson's commentary makes this classic work of art even better.  This movie is so awesome that I'm almost NOT being sarcastic!  I think it is a travesty that it didn't win any Academy Awards.

[Sharktopus]

It's as if Rowdy Harrington found a way to directly convert pure testosterone into film.  Mike Nelson's commentary makes this classic work of art even better.  This movie is so awesome that I'm almost NOT being sarcastic!  I think it is a travesty that it didn't win any Academy Awards.

I'm sure that travesty will one day be rectified when Mr Harrington receives his Honorary Academy Award for Lifetime Achievement in the Field of High-Testosterone Filmmaking.

[Hebs]

Wait - Carrot Top IS NOT in it?!   Sign me up!!

I actually haven't seen this one yet, which I know is a Rifforum sin, so I'll try to remedy that 'sbest I can.

[Bob]

One of my favorite riffs. 

Unfortuantely, much to my eternal horror, I was watching it with a friend of mine who went to Texas A&M (I like to rag on his school) and there was a scene in the movie where Patrick was addressing all the bouncers and there was a dullard bouncer wearing a "Missouri" (where I went to college) sweatshirt.   He went ape shit and still mentions the Missouri Dullard to this day.

[Sharktopus]

Wait - Carrot Top IS NOT in it?!   Sign me up!!

I actually haven't seen this one yet, which I know is a Rifforum sin, so I'll try to remedy that 'sbest I can.

Not that you haven't heard this before, but it's really funny. I don't usually like Mike's solo Riffs as much, but Roadhouse is excellent.

Did I just call Roadhouse excellent?

[BBQ Platypus]

Wait - Carrot Top IS NOT in it?!   Sign me up!!

I actually haven't seen this one yet, which I know is a Rifforum sin, so I'll try to remedy that 'sbest I can.

Not that you haven't heard this before, but it's really funny. I don't usually like Mike's solo Riffs as much, but Roadhouse is excellent.

Did I just call Roadhouse excellent?

Yes, you did.  Don't worry.

I, for one, plan on having a Patrick Swayze Christmas this year!  Who's with me?