Kindergarten Ninja (1994)

[WhyDontTheyLook]

I D.A.R.E. you to riff this:

From IMDB: "Dead Bruce's status in heaven can be upgraded if he performs a miracle, which becomes rehabilitating wrong-living gridiron star, Blade Steel. Bruce attempts this by getting Blade interested in martial arts, which Blade, in turn, teaches to students where he is performing community service for three months."

I just watched this and... uh... wow. Just... wow. It makes Samurai Cop look lucid and subtle. And a couple music numbers worthy of a James Nguyen film. It's a future riff classic in waiting.