Did we learn anything dangerous?

[Pastor of Muppets]

I learned that, if you are attempting to sound intimidating, your message will be undercut if you mention that you fuck farm animals.
I learned that there were apparently no women in Russia.  Poor little farm animals.
I learned that there is only one Vlad in little Russia.
I learned that you don't have to worry about making your hero likeable if your plot doesn't make any sense and he mumbles all his dialogue.
I learned that crooked cops will engage in their crimes in full uniform and marked cars.
I learned that you can get shot in the heart and you'll be fine if you just make an improvised tourniquet or bandage or something out of a dead guy's shirt.
I learned that you can just decide that your character is an Indian even after casting a white guy.
I learned just how boring a shootout scene can be.

[fodder650]

So I learned that "Indian" means something very different in this world. Maybe this was meant to be a Bollywood movie.
Vlad is an uncommon name.
Dad Russian has an odd way of doing intimidation to cops.
I go back to the 15 edits it took to go over a fence in Taken. Not sure why this movie reminds me of that.
There is a lot of use of a single burner phone. Do we not know what a burner phone is?
"We made it gentlemen. It doesn't get any better than this" - possibly one of the top riffs here among some really good material.
35% of the budget went to squibs in the one fight sequence.

[Prince of Space]

I learned that if you take a squirt three times during this movie Steven Segal will personally show up to your door and ask to sleep on your couch.