What was the maximum amount of learning we achieved?

[Pastor of Muppets]

I learned that terrorists with an atomic bomb will make as much noise as possible to plant a hidden atomic bomb, instead of doing something simple like tossing it in the back of a moving van and parking it in some parking garage.  Maybe they were just too cheap to pay the exorbitant cost of downtown parking?

I learned that a one hour timer will count down 6,000 seconds.

I learned that if you commit the federal offense of detonating a bomb at an IRS office, you will be placed in a state prison where you can be pardoned by the state governor.

I learned that somebody was trying to get the maximum amount of revenge, but we're not sure who.

I learned that if you hijack a plane and take hostages on the ground, the police will just let you go afterwards.

I learned that if a police officer shoots one of the hostage takers during the crisis, the officer will go to prison instead of you.  So plan your crimes accordingly.

I learned that revenge is quantitative, and that you can get different amounts of revenge on people.

[fodder650]

I learned that there may be a category C to movies instead of just A B and Z.
I learned that a cop thrown in prison to smooth things over can end up end up getting a pardon without much of the plot being known to the outside world
I learned six cop cars and two vans will show up to the scene as the entire cities police force
I learned that the cover to the Rifftrax version of this may be one of the most accurate and dead on caricatures of any of the movies that they have done so far.
I learned that if you are going to do Die Hard in a Prison well then go all in with the very end (and holy crap the reporter part just hit me typing that line)
I (looking at cue cards) learned that (reading cue cards) acting (looking and right at camera) is hard
I also learned that the way to open all the doors (minus 1 plot door) in a prisons is to run a .com .exe or .bat file on a floppy called 123. Remember kids she typed A:\123 and hit enter

[dbsommer]

I learned what the result of someone who watched Die Hard exactly once and said, "I can do that", then went out and tried to do it would look like. Assuming they had no budget and didn't care what the end result was like.

I learned Icebreaker was light years better in every way. That was 'Die Hard at a Ski Lodge' vs 'Die Hard in a Prison."

I learned this was an action movie whose action bored me to tears.

I learned Mean Guns was a much better shoot 'em up in prison than this. And it was directed by the guy that did Max Havoc which was also riffed, so it's not like he's regarded as top notch.

I learned the actresses in this had far more film credits than the guys. Because they did some *ahem* raunchy films and had some actual talent for what they did. The guys in this did not have talent in anything. Also thanks to the (understandable) cuts, the guys were topless more often than the ladies.

[eegah]

I learned that when you want to make your low-budget movie look like a lot of people worked on it, you can just add fake credits at the end!

Casting Assistant - Herbert H. Hebert
Carpenters - John & Karen
Post Production Runner - Cash Flagg
Payroll Master - Eny Deyno
Production Secretary - Twister Spankle
Transportation Coordinator - Leaf Alday
Picture Car Coordinator - Crash Corrigan
Production Coordinator - Tony Stark
Script Supervisor - Mary Jane Watson
Steadicam Op - Zachary Garber
1st Asst B Camera - Ted Striker
2nd Asst B Camera - Nick Rivers
Asst Set Decorator - Art DeCeau
On Set Dresser - Woody Drawers
Asst Prop Master - Hans Hopf
Production Runner - James Thorpe
1st AD - Bruce Banner
2nd AD - Reed Richards
Boom Operator - Stretch O'Connel
Electrician - Sparks McGee
Stage Manager - Stan Boards

(I may have missed some, and possibly flagged a couple as fake that aren't)