Up, Up, Down, Down, Left, Right, Left Right, Select What You Learned!

[Darth Geek]

I learned you could get away with cussing and swearing in PG movies in the late 80s

They would occasionally have a little nudity in them too.

[Trekker4747]

I learned you could get away with cussing and swearing in PG movies in the late 80s

You can get away with mild curses and only in non-sexual or non-bodily function contexts. (The old thing where you can be "pissed off" but not because you were "pissed on.")

I learned that small-town sheriff/police departments get sort of annoyed and eventually indifferent about doing their jobs when it comes to runaway children.

I learned that Utah group homes for children with mental disorders pretty much keep their kids sitting alone in rooms watching TV. Rather than, I dunno, therapy. School. Or really any kid of activity other than sitting there watching TV.  You do get a rather spacious, private, -though stark- room.

[ManUnderMask]

I learned that a movie that's first act is in Utah has a distinct lack of Mormons.

[Johnny Unusual]

I learned child bounty hunter is a job.

I hadn't learned whether the scoring system was based on scoring actual points or based on how far they get.  I mean, does getting the warp whistle help you if you are after points?

[Pak-Man]

That scoring system has bugged me since the first time I saw it. They never say what those running guys are representing. There are numbers attached to them, but they have nothing to do with stage or score. It's just, "Look! He did a thing and now he's ahead!"

[The Lurker]

That scoring system has bugged me since the first time I saw it. They never say what those running guys are representing. There are numbers attached to them, but they have nothing to do with stage or score. It's just, "Look! He did a thing and now he's ahead!"

So that's where Whose Line got the idea from. 

[Toplar Scarre]

I learned that ten minutes of Video Armageddon time is equal to four minutes and forty nine seconds of real time.

Also, I learned that having The Wizard in a ten film "family favorites" set that I got at Wal-Mart for five bucks did not guarantee viewing of the film at any time (I got the set for the films "Cloak and Dagger" and "Matinee"), but I have watched the RiffTrax version three times already.

[Trekker4747]

That scoring system has bugged me since the first time I saw it. They never say what those running guys are representing. There are numbers attached to them, but they have nothing to do with stage or score. It's just, "Look! He did a thing and now he's ahead!"

It seemed implied to be based on the score, but the way they behave doesn't too greatly reflect that, considering for part of the competition it seemed like Jimmy was in last place by thousands of points but found the warp-zone and sped ahead?

It also seems to not be a great indicator of how good one is at a game, even in a platformer like SMB3 it's possible to "grind" in order to get a high score.  Make you kill all of the enemies, get all of the coins, smash all of the blocks, all will rack up the score but at the cost of time and advancement in the game.

Teleport a modern-day hard-core retro-gamer into that contest and even under the conditions of not exploiting glitches they'd be able to defeat SM3 inside 10 minutes.  But they'd have a low score due to not wasting time fighting enemies, getting coins, and so forth. So would they have lost Video Game Armageddon even though they'd be the first child to ever defeat SM3?

Jimmy's finding of the warp flute and knowing how to use it yo get to the warp zone seems to advance him in the running even though in reality such an action wouldn't be worth several thousand points.

And, seriously, how the fuck did he even *guess* to do such a thing?!

[Trekker4747]

Okay, to expand on how the movie makers weren't even trying to make the final battle and points system make sense this sequence of events happens.

We see Jimmy as (regular) Mario square-off against one of the boomerang-throwing turtles and he eventually dies.  He has 27,650 points on the game GUI.

Corey and Haley react and try and to encourage Jimmy on.

We're shown the scoring graphic for the competition.

Lucas is way out in front with 44,800 points, Mora slightly ahead with 46,400 points and Jimmy's avatar is maybe 3/4s of the way to being more-or-less even with the other two with 30,700 points.  So not exactly a "scaled" representation of the events.

Dying causes a "warp graphic" to appear in his avatar's path which drags him way bag to the far-left of the screen. Mora and Lucas remain way out front.

After this happens the scores seem to "advance" or update, now giving Lucas 56,200; Mora 53,800 and Jimmy 48,400.  Lucas's avatar jerks forward a bit to represent his now leading position.

But it still seems Jimmy's avatar's placement isn't scaled well with Lucas's and Mora's.

[Darth Geek]

You guys are putting WAY more thought into it than the filmmakers clearly did.

[Trekker4747]

It really didn't take me *that* much thought.

[Darth Geek]

It really didn't take me *that* much thought.

I still stand by my statement.

[MightyBombJack]

Some of the video game stuff in The Wizard was so inaccurate that even noted non-fan of video games (with a few exceptions here and there, like a weird Japanese PC game from 1994 called Cosmology of Kyoto) Roger Ebert was able to spot an error:

http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/the-wizard-1989

[msrjsph]

I learned that creepy antagonists only exist to demonstrate the product the corporation wants you to buy...

and I also learned that our Rifftrax guys are really good at connecting the dots...the comment about Lucas being "Gamergate Study Patient Zero" is a bit more disturbing when you learn what happened with Jackey Vinson: http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0899092/bio?ref_=nm_dyk_trv_sm#trivia

[The Lurker]

Apparently, winning a contest is enough to drop all ongoing conflicts.