What mutant powers did we learn about this time?

[Trekker4747]

X-Men The Last Stand's riff is now out and some are either watching it now, planning on watching it, or still sitting in the corner by the spotlight crying over the abortion of a movie this was.

So, what great things did we learn about mutants and superheroes this time out?

[CJones]

I learned that it is possible to make a Rifftrax of a movie starring Kelsey Grammer and only make one Kelsey Grammer driving joke. I'm impressed at their restraint.

Also, I learned that Jean's hair continues to grow while in psychic stasis, even though she's not even breathing. She must have been down there quite a while 'cause it's at least a foot longer than in the last movie. Not that I'm complaining...

[Thrashalla]

I'm impressed at their restraint.

*Saved for use in future arguments*

[Trekker4747]

I learned that even though in past movies it took Wolverine's healing a few seconds to work even at times requiring him to lose consciousness he can weather and heal during powerful psionic blasts pretty well.

I learned that Mystique occasional takes on a default human form in order to dye and cut her hair.

I leaned that my understanding of how suspension bridges work has been completely mistaken.

I learned that Alcatraz is a suitable and viable place to build a modern medical research and development lab.

I learned that Beast's hair can be disintegrated and regrown quite quickly and easily.

[Watchman]

I learned that chess is a lot simpler than I thought it was.

Chess is to X-Men what English Lit is to Star Trek.

I've learned that Magneto is now a lonely old Holocaust survivor who plays chess by himself in public parks, doomed to spend his remaining mortal years as an existentialist.

I've learned that the Golden Gate Bridge is no longer the top destination for suicides.

I've learned that Douche Cushion is a more memorable name than whatever that character was actually named.

[CJones]

I've learned that Douche Cushion is a more memorable name than whatever that character was actually named.

I'm on my second time through, and I still have no idea what his name is. Do they even say?

I learned that Jean's childhood home is the worst constructed house in the world. I watched this movie unriffed yesterday, and when Wolverine fell through the floor, all I could think was "please tell me they make fun of that". So when I watched the riff today and Kevin did his "paper mache" riff, I was like "YES!" 

[dignan]

I learned that the movie is 90% class dismissals.

[Watchman]

I've learned that Douche Cushion is a more memorable name than whatever that character was actually named.

I'm on my second time through, and I still have no idea what his name is. Do they even say?

No idea. Porcupine? I'm sure we could find it on IMDB or Wikipedia, but I really don't care that much. Movies shouldn't force you to resort to that anyway, not if they achieve basic storytelling constructs like character identification.

And I now think of Kelsey Grammer's character as "Blue Razzberry". Thanks, Bill!

I've also learned that Ellen Page deals with death by creating. And creating. And creating! And CREATING!

[Scribblesense]

I learned:

that claws beat antlers.
that Dark Phoenix is just mad because everything isn't more "up".
that taking a cheese grater into the bathroom isn't normal.
that when your boss tells you to keep someone out of the building, the first thing you do is throw that guy through the window into the building.
that lightning is apparently useless.
and that capes are pretty kick ass.

[Bob]

I've learned that Douche Cushion is a more memorable name than whatever that character was actually named.

I'm on my second time through, and I still have no idea what his name is. Do they even say?
 

Apparently he was called "Kid Omega"...... Although I don't recall anyone actually calling him that.   And kinda old to be called a kid.   

[Cosmic Muse]

Apparently he was called "Kid Omega"...... Although I don't recall anyone actually calling him that.   And kinda old to be called a kid.   

Maybe Kid is his first name? 

[Rattrap007]

I heard his name was Quill..

[misterthomason]

Glad to see you guys were stumped by that character's name as well, we spent a good 20 minutes trying to sort out what the hell he was called during the writing process. (seems the filmmakers just pulled a name at random from the X-Men wiki) Fortunately I promptly forgot everything we learned, so I have nothing helpful to contribute.

[skenderberg]

Glad to see you guys were stumped by that character's name as well, we spent a good 20 minutes trying to sort out what the hell he was called during the writing process. (seems the filmmakers just pulled a name at random from the X-Men wiki) Fortunately I promptly forgot everything we learned, so I have nothing helpful to contribute.

Putting on my X-Men Geek hat for a minute here:

The credits call him Kid Omega, who was sort of a psychic drug addict gang leader in the comic books.  The powers he exhibits most resemble a comic book continuity mutant named Quill.  Basically, they lifted a character from continuity and gave him the wrong name.  It's kind of confusing, as if they'd included an adamantium skeleton/healing factor mutant and then called him Cyclops.

Taking off my X-Men Geek hat now.  Hopefully I won't need it again for a while.

[Bob]

Putting on my X-Men Geek hat for a minute here:

The credits call him Kid Omega, who was sort of a psychic drug addict gang leader in the comic books.  The powers he exhibits most resemble a comic book continuity mutant named Quill.  Basically, they lifted a character from continuity and gave him the wrong name.  It's kind of confusing, as if they'd included an adamantium skeleton/healing factor mutant and then called him Cyclops.

Taking off my X-Men Geek hat now.  Hopefully I won't need it again for a while.

Even the makers of "Attack of the the Eye Creatures" are appalled by that.