Twilight 2: New Moon

[esoobaC .T bocaJ]

This is the only twilight book I've actually read (well, listened to in audiobook form).

The thing I'm wondering about is whether or not Bella will maintain her level of high-grade denseness.

I mean, there are lots of attacks by "animals" in the woods, her friend Jacob gets a "fever" and then joins a "cult" that involves members who growl at people, and she actually sees a vampire get chased off by bear-sized wolves, and Jacob comes by and reminds her to think back to a certain legend he told her about that explains this, and she STILL needs an eerie dream sequence to piece it all together! ADD IT UP BELLA, YOU DENSE, DENSE GIRL!

You're telling me the winner of the almighty golden apple took that long to piece together such obviousness? That sounds more like denseness on the part of the author, wanting to drag out the "suspense" way longer than she should have.

ONION!!!! the golden ONION!! shame on you

Hey Caboose, let's try out!

ooh, sounds like fun.......... ah who am I kidding, I'd never get cast the Twilight films. They only use the highest quality talent 

[Tripe]

Hey Caboose, let's try out!

Wait where's that? Becasue, seriously, I'd try out. I'd even sneak a "This movie is better with Rifftrax" sign into the shot

[TeamRAD]

http://www.filmgecko.com/new-moon-is-casting-extras-apply-online/

Bummer, it may not be legit. 

Here's another link:

http://acting411.blogspot.com/search?q=eclipse

Caboose, go after the role of Seth Clearwater. Tripe, Royce King, the Second, is yours. As for me, I don't like attention, so I'll settle for being an extra. 

[Tripe]

http://www.filmgecko.com/new-moon-is-casting-extras-apply-online/

Bummer, it may not be legit. 

"No experience is needed. All looks and types wanted. Make $150-$300 per day."

Oh yeah I know that site, eventually you get to see the gleaming pated Joey Lawrence shilling for this company that you pay a fee to and then they promise to find you work. Whoa! indeed. 

[anais.jude]

Hey Caboose, let's try out!

Wait where's that? Becasue, seriously, I'd try out. I'd even sneak a "This movie is better with Rifftrax" sign into the shot

Why does Edward look like a Cure cover band reject?

[Tripe]

Oh Fat Bob would love to be that thin. Come to mention it, there is a sort of resemblance between them though; like blokie from Twilight is the "after" picture in the fitness gadget ad and Fat Bob is the "before".

[Trumpysgirl]

Just saw the trailer.....I.....can't ......still laughing........!

I just love the utter cluelessness on Bella's face when she cuts her finger. What the hell, Bella? You're in a room full of VAMPIRES; do you think they would just shrug it off?

But, like, OHMIGOD, Edward is so HOTT. It makes me want to find an abusive relationship!

[anais.jude]

So, i finished the book the other day, and my friend Shadow showed me the trailer today...I don't think there is anyway I could capture the moment as well as Ronin (who was laughing his ass off at us). Over to you Ronin....

[TeamRAD]

Hey Caboose, let's try out!

Wait where's that? Becasue, seriously, I'd try out. I'd even sneak a "This movie is better with Rifftrax" sign into the shot

Why does Edward look like a Cure cover band reject?

I was thinking he looks like Ashton Kutcher, circa his days of playing Chester from Dude, Where's My Car?

Just saw the trailer.....I.....can't ......still laughing........!

I've watched the trailer several times, and its opening sequence still makes me giggle non-stop. Bella looks so feckin annoyed. Come on, Ed...you can do so much better than that! Well, so can Alice!

I've got the weekend of November 20th circled on my figurative calendar.

[Fuzzy Necromancer]

I wanna be cast as Alice. =o

Also, for some reason, this movie coming out makes me want to read "Blood and Chocolate."

[RoninFox]

So, i finished the book the other day, and my friend Shadow showed me the trailer today...I don't think there is anyway I could capture the moment as well as Ronin (who was laughing his ass off at us). Over to you Ronin....

Oh, where to start.  My insistence that Edward always looks like someone just flattened his face with a shovel?  Your description of how incredibly awesome the book was until the last 40 pages completely f***ed it up?  My personal favorite part though was the squeal of indignation accompanied by loud "THAT'S NOT WHAT HAPPENED!!!" when Indian guy went all CGI lupine.

[RoninFox]

I wanna be cast as Alice. =o

Also, for some reason, this movie coming out makes me want to read "Blood and Chocolate."

Anyone see the movie version of that?  I was vaguely curious about it, but I've yet to hear a single good review.

[Fuzzy Necromancer]

I figure if I can survive being forced to watch the Harry Potter movies in the name of Rifftrax, I can endure this series as well.

Though having to watch Twilight a few weeks ago ruined Hot Topic for me for a while. And I've got gift cards for there, too. 

No, I'm not sure you can.

Harry Potter isn't the best book series ever written, but it's The Illiad compared to Twilight.

Harry Potter has characters, with personality traits,and the protagonist even has several interests and is at the least a two-dimensional character.

Harry Potter has a plot, complete with rising action, climax, and falling action.

Harry Potter as conflict.

Harry Potter has a protagonist with flaws that he comes to, who has to suffer loss and overcome obstacles, and by "suffer loss", I mean "loss that doesn't just consist of having to spend seconds away from your beloved" and "obstacles" I mean "obstacles other than one's own staggering stupidity and arbitrary unwillingness to accept gifts." Sure, Harry hast overcome his own stupidity as well, but he still needs to actually use his noggin sometimes, and even if the series has it's share of deus ex machinas, not everything just falls into his lap.

Harry Potter has vampires, well, a vampire, and that vampire doesn't sparkle. They buy blood-flavored lollipops, but they still don't sparkle.

In Harry Potter, things HAPPEN. Sure, there may be padded out quidditch scenes, and lots of high school drama, but that's my point. It's actual drama, with conflicts, fights, and a lack of perfection, not superficial idiot plots based on Bella worrying if Edward is too perfect for her to be real. He also fights monsters, duels for his life with evil sorcerers, and pass exams. While Harry Potter spent days practicing the patronus charm and summoning spells, Bella just wins the golden onion without any effort.

Did I mention Harry Potter doesn't have sparkly vampires?

[Tyrant]

Did I mention Harry Potter doesn't have sparkly vampires?

  Sold!!!

  Actually not really. Can't stand Harry Potter but from what you described, I'd rather read/watch HP thousands of times than surrender even a few precious moments of life not related to a Rifftrax version on Twilight.

  Oh, for anyone interested (or bored), here's my rant about Twilight. I was very frustrated at the time I wrote it:
http://blogs.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=blog.view&friendId=119924767&blogId=487797967

[Lovye]

Adding this post to this thread:

Yes, the second in the Twilight Saga is here, dragging along with it such beloved characters as the Elf, "I'M HARPO!", and, probably others!!!  Now with wearwilfs!!!

Wonder in silent agony, 'WHY oh WHY does the drop of blood GROW ON THE CARPET?!!!'
If she can cut herself on WRAPPING PAPER, what else can she cut herself on?!!!
How much Walkening sans Walken can a movie take?

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh.....it's going to be agonizingly antagonizing.  If you thought Edward "Twinkle Tits" *Last Name Here* was passive-agressively abusive in Twilight, then you are CLEARLY not familiar with the mind wreckage that is:

New Moon.

I am looking forward to this.  Surely this will atone for some things I have done....

One another note.... What I find REALLY funny is that even in that 2minute trailer there are at LEAST 3 inconsistencies with the books.
I can't wait for this movie to come out just so someone can riff it a new one...though honestly... i can't wait for the 4th movie to come out so we can all get this out of our system and move on to more interesting things... like... watching paint dry... or grass grow... or... any number of other things that don't involve annoying emo teen vamps.... Bleh.

What I find funny is that somebody is actually taking it so seriously as to actually comparing it to the book....STOP THAT!!!!

Everything else you said...I agree with.  SPOT. ON.