Starship Dave

[Petey Wheatstraw]

Oh, dear.

Honesty, though, there is no shame in being outgrossed by Good Burger.  I mean, it did have Abe Vigoda.

The title is "50 Movies That Out-Grossed Meet Dave In Their Opening Weekends," but if you scroll down, you see "Titanic, in its 18th week of release," "My Big Fat Greek Wedding in its 30th week of release," and "That movie Hidalgo in its 3rd week of release." That being said, there are actually a few decent movies on that list.

[Rattrap007]

Oh, dear.

Honesty, though, there is no shame in being outgrossed by Good Burger.  I mean, it did have Abe Vigoda.

Ow! Ow!

Seriously that is not good. Reading through it I was thinking "OW!! Oooch! OW! Now that movie isn't all that bad... OOOoooooo... ooooh Ow! That beat Meet Dave? OOOOooh!"

[Bob]

I think this poor movie had too many strikes against it going in, to really do well.

[mrbasehart]

Bill might be peversely proud of how poorly Meet Dave has done so far.  I mean it's not like had gross points or anything...

[Rattrap007]

I think this poor movie had too many strikes against it going in, to really do well.

Think the only high water mark for us is Bill wrote it...

[Bob]

I think this poor movie had too many strikes against it going in, to really do well.

Think the only high water mark for us is Bill wrote it...

Can you imagine the horror is some no talent hacks wrote it?    It might have been the new Manos.

[Steve-O]

Think the only high water mark for us is Bill wrote it...

Well, Bill wrote a script.  I have little doubt, though, that the final product is a long way removed from the vision Bill and his partner originally had for it.  Sucks to be a writer in Hollywood these days.

Kinda makes ya wonder whether Akiva Goldsman isn't really a literary genius who's been sorely misrepresented by producers all these years, doesn't it?  No?  Me neither.

Must be one hell of a rollercoaster ride.  It would be mind-blowingly cool to have something that you wrote made into a real, honest-to-goodness, Hollywood movie.  With marketing push, and big name talent, and everything!  But then it turns out that the movie they made is Meet Dave.  To paraphrase one of my co-writers on the Batman and Robin script, "Uma Thurman has agreed to sleep with you, but she insists on wearing the gorilla suit."

Meanwhile, I'm fighting with myself over whether to buy a ticket.  On the one hand, I want to support Bill and increase the chances that he might get future writing gigs.  On the other, I want to protest the rank defilement of a (I assume) perfectly good script.  Do you suppose if I passed a hand-written note to the ticket taker expressing my outrage, he'd pass it along to the studio?

[Petey Wheatstraw]

Think the only high water mark for us is Bill wrote it...

Well, Bill wrote a script.  I have little doubt, though, that the final product is a long way removed from the vision Bill and his partner originally had for it.  Sucks to be a writer in Hollywood these days.

Kinda makes ya wonder whether Akiva Goldsman isn't really a literary genius who's been sorely misrepresented by producers all these years, doesn't it?  No?  Me neither.

Must be one hell of a rollercoaster ride.  It would be mind-blowingly cool to have something that you wrote made into a real, honest-to-goodness, Hollywood movie.  With marketing push, and big name talent, and everything!  But then it turns out that the movie they made is Meet Dave.  To paraphrase one of my co-writers on the Batman and Robin script, "Uma Thurman has agreed to sleep with you, but she insists on wearing the gorilla suit."

Meanwhile, I'm fighting with myself over whether to buy a ticket.  On the one hand, I want to support Bill and increase the chances that he might get future writing gigs.  On the other, I want to protest the rank defilement of a (I assume) perfectly good script.  Do you suppose if I passed a hand-written note to the ticket taker expressing my outrage, he'd pass it along to the studio?

What makes you so sure that they butchered the script? I think most critics were biased against the star, director and concept going in, and 20th Century Fox mismanaged the film by releasing it against bigger competition. Or else Bill might have written a poor script to begin with? There's no reason to assume that Bill had absolutely no part in whatever fault the film might have. Don't assign blame if you don't really know what the case really is.

Again, I haven't seen it yet, so I have no idea if the film is actually bad.

[torgosPizza]

What makes you so sure that they butchered the script?

When Bill told us they (probably) did.

http://blog.rifftrax.com/2008/07/10/meat-dave/

[T]he truth is that I had not a bit of control over the final product, and Hollywood does tend to suckify things. Often quite badly. In fact, there was a week of writing done AFTER the last draft Rob and I submitted, and that's a scary prospect.

[Petey Wheatstraw]

What makes you so sure that they butchered the script?

When Bill told us they (probably) did.

http://blog.rifftrax.com/2008/07/10/meat-dave/

[T]he truth is that I had not a bit of control over the final product, and Hollywood does tend to suckify things. Often quite badly. In fact, there was a week of writing done AFTER the last draft Rob and I submitted, and that's a scary prospect.

Well, there's a number of factors, one being that if a film has as much negativity geared toward it before its release, you have to cover you ass somehow. When he wrote that blog, he hadn't seen the film, so he had to explain that there was material added after the original script was turned in to let people know that "if it does turn out to be Battlefield Earth 2, it wasn't my fault!" We cannot be absolutely certain that the script was butchered.

[Steve-O]

What makes you so sure that they butchered the script? I think most critics were biased against the star, director and concept going in, and 20th Century Fox mismanaged the film by releasing it against bigger competition. Or else Bill might have written a poor script to begin with?

Hence the use of the phrase, "I assume."  Maybe I should make the fact that I don't actually have insider knowledge more clear in the future.

There's no reason to assume that Bill had absolutely no part in whatever fault the film might have. Don't assign blame if you don't really know what the case really is.

I don't think I'm making a big leap here.  I assume Bill wrote a decent script because I know him to be a good writer from his past work.  I assume it's a bad film without having seen it because the sheer number of bad reviews -- and the intensity of the vitriol contained within -- have in the past proven to be reliable indicators of badness.  I assume the film has been pre-drained of all the humor that I assume was in the original script because the trailers make me sad instead of joyful, and because the examples of the film's humor cited in the reviews -- admittedly, taken totally out of context -- have only added to my suffering.

I also assume Bill wasn't outright lying when he mentioned that helper monkeys did a pass or two on his script after he submitted the final draft.

But hey, I'm willing to admit the possibility that all of the above is false, that what is on the screen is a direct translation of the contents of Bill's mind's eye onto celluloid, and that Meet Dave is the new high water mark for science fiction comedy.

[esoobaC .T bocaJ]

I have seen Meet the Starship, it had it's moments, I liked it, not that it was good mind you.

[Petey Wheatstraw]

What makes you so sure that they butchered the script? I think most critics were biased against the star, director and concept going in, and 20th Century Fox mismanaged the film by releasing it against bigger competition. Or else Bill might have written a poor script to begin with?

Hence the use of the phrase, "I assume."  Maybe I should make the fact that I don't actually have insider knowledge more clear in the future.

There's no reason to assume that Bill had absolutely no part in whatever fault the film might have. Don't assign blame if you don't really know what the case really is.

I don't think I'm making a big leap here.  I assume Bill wrote a decent script because I know him to be a good writer from his past work.  I assume it's a bad film without having seen it because the sheer number of bad reviews -- and the intensity of the vitriol contained within -- have in the past proven to be reliable indicators of badness.  I assume the film has been pre-drained of all the humor that I assume was in the original script because the trailers make me sad instead of joyful, and because the examples of the film's humor cited in the reviews -- admittedly, taken totally out of context -- have only added to my suffering.

I also assume Bill wasn't outright lying when he mentioned that helper monkeys did a pass or two on his script after he submitted the final draft.

But hey, I'm willing to admit the possibility that all of the above is false, that what is on the screen is a direct translation of the contents of Bill's mind's eye onto celluloid, and that Meet Dave is the new high water mark for science fiction comedy.

Reviews are rarely an indication of quality. (See also: Every M. Night Shyamalan movie ever made.)

[Steve-O]

Reviews are rarely an indication of quality. (See also: Every M. Night Shyamalan movie ever made.)

True, individual reviews are not accurate indicators of quality.  But great, heaping gobs of reviews taken together tend to be pretty much on the money, at least for me.  And that goes for the consensus opinion on Shyamalan's films as well.

But that doesn't mean you can't like them.

[Petey Wheatstraw]

Reviews are rarely an indication of quality. (See also: Every M. Night Shyamalan movie ever made.)

True, individual reviews are not accurate indicators of quality.  But great, heaping gobs of reviews taken together tend to be pretty much on the money, at least for me.  And that goes for the consensus opinion on Shyamalan's films as well.

But that doesn't mean you can't like them.

I'm just saying not to assume that because there were rewrites, that there was a draft written with Bill's involvement that was an absolute masterpiece of comedic science fiction. He wrote a film for younger audiences, and the majority of critics and viewers did not take that into account in their reaction to the film. I doubt that Starship Dave would have ever produced one of the greatest comedies of all time, even if there were no rewrites.