What did we learn?

[eegah]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

I did NOT learn what the plot of this movie was.

[dbsommer]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

That is authentic Eastern mythology. Sparkly Seattle vampires, that's something Western romance novelists came up with.

[losingmydignity]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

That is authentic Eastern mythology. Sparkly Seattle vampires, that's something Western romance novelists came up with.

Source please...

[Darth Geek]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

That is authentic Eastern mythology. Sparkly Seattle vampires, that's something Western romance novelists came up with.

Source please...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jiangshi

[eegah]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

That is authentic Eastern mythology. Sparkly Seattle vampires, that's something Western romance novelists came up with.

Source please...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jiangshi

Thanks! I learned something actually interesting from this riff, after all.

[CJones]

I learned that sparkling in the sun is not the stupidest thing that a vampire can do (hop! hop! hop!)

That is authentic Eastern mythology. Sparkly Seattle vampires, that's something Western romance novelists came up with.

Source please...

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jiangshi

Thanks! I learned something actually interesting from this riff, after all.

Yep. Hsien-Ko from the Darkstalkers series is a Jiangshi. You can also find them in the cemetery level in Spelunky.

[Pastor of Muppets]

I learned that a scary basement full of stupid hopping vampires is a good place to prepare food.

I learn that if a robot is shot with a bazooka, blows up, and catches on fire, he's just "short circuited" and can be repaired in about 5 minutes.

I learned that you can make a Robocop ripoff that looks even worse than the joking one that The Onion's Film Standard made.

[fodder650]

I learned that the plot to Feeders 1 and 2 makes more sense than this because its simpler.
I learned that "I turned into my Grandfather for a moment" isn't limited to the riffers.
I remembered all the eighties animes put on American TV that would turn sake into "water" like Star Blazers or Robotech and how we just got the "drugs" here. It seemed to fit that kind of theme.
I learned that if you look in the final scene that you can make one one of the crew briefly making an appearance on the back right of the scene. Just a flash of the person. Not enough to really make a person out but something is there more than an effect.
I learned that the most sympathetic character in the movie is Peter. I would have felt more sorry for his bride right until that little trick on our robot friend at the end. tsk tsk.

[dbsommer]

I learned this is the most random movie they've done. With good reason since it's two unconnected films jammed together. But still
I learned nudity fit right in this one. It was so ridiculous and over the top it was practically a requirement.
I learned when you jam two unconnected movies together, it plays out as such.
I learned your cyborg can look like a baked potato covered in foil.
I learned it never occurred to anyone to kill the guy controlling the indestructible hopping vampires rather than the indestructible hopping vampires.
I learned conventional explosives are much better to use against cyborgs than hopping vampires.
I learned you should never mix vampires with your drug trade.
I learned this is drug church is still a bunch of lightweights compared to the Church of Violence in Black Lagoon. You need lots of firearms and hair trigger tempers to go with the drugs.

[Mark A. Siefert]

I learned that the Wikipedia entry on Jiangshi mentioned nothing about gorilla masks, the power to shoot Roman candles out of their sleeves, and their love-affairs with topless ghost women.