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Author Topic: Return to the Sad Cafe  (Read 6703 times)

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Online RVR II

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #75 on: May 25, 2020, 05:27:32 AM »
Just got finished cutting my late wife's cell number with AT&T.
It was her primary number for our Spanish-Services business from 2001 when we got married and formed the business in 2002. I kept it active the last 3 years and 4 and a half months for those remaining dedicated clients that still came around for doing their taxes, notarizations or other services, but the number of spam calls as well as phishing text messages have steadily increased since her passing while the number of client calls have continued to decrease so it came time to just sever the line completely :-[
Her old cell phone has been unplugged from it's charging cord and will be allowed to turn off for good when the battery dies :(
« Last Edit: May 25, 2020, 05:30:18 AM by RVR II »


Offline Russoguru

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #76 on: September 05, 2020, 12:18:10 PM »
I had to put my cat Ziva to sleep today. He was such a good boy. I loved him so much and losing him just... it took a big bite out of my soul. I will heal, but you know how it goes, you grieve... the stages of grief... then one day soon you're whole again.

I was there on my knees holding his paw and his face close to me as they injected the drugs into his veins to stop his heart. It was the very least I could do for my boy, that his very last moments were spent hearing me and holding him and me telling him that I loved him very much. He did me a solid while he was here. He brought me much love and joy since he was born here in this house 13 and a half years ago. The least I could do was make his last moments alive as pleasant as humanly possible.

It is never easy putting a pet to sleep, because they are more than pets, more than friends even. They're our guardians, our children, our kids. It is no weakness, it is strength in fact to mourn for them, because mourning, allowing yourself to be vulnerable yet to be strong for them, to be there in their last moments for them truly takes strength of character(not to kiss my own ass or anything).
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Offline CJones

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #77 on: September 06, 2020, 09:34:26 AM »
I feel for you Russoguru. And well said. Didn't know you were so eloquent :) It never gets any easier. Worse still when you've raised a pet from birth. It sucks that cats and dogs live so much shorter lives than we do. I always struggle with the decision: Should I put them to "sleep", or wait for them to die naturally?

I've had probably a dozen cats over the last 40 years (by "I" I mean my family). I'm always reluctant to take another in because I dread having to bury them. But my current three cats just showed up one day as kittens a few years ago, right across the street. I wasn't going to leave them, and shelters around here aren't great.

Just out of curiosity, how did you get Ziva?


Offline Russoguru

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #78 on: September 06, 2020, 04:42:17 PM »
I feel for you Russoguru. And well said. Didn't know you were so eloquent :)
Thank you Cjones. That is very, very kind of you. It's taken me a long time to learn how to be good with words. I like to say my major in English helped me out a lot.
It never gets any easier. Worse still when you've raised a pet from birth. It sucks that cats and dogs live so much shorter lives than we do. I always struggle with the decision: Should I put them to "sleep", or wait for them to die naturally?
I think it depends on how much they are suffering... I know, that is a very broad and subjective standard, but I think if your fur baby has been living with you long enough, you can kind of tell when they are so miserable, in so much pain that maybe it is time to take them to the vet for the very last time.  :'(
Just out of curiosity, how did you get Ziva?
We found a black cat wandering outside our house about 14 years ago we named Midnight. We took pity on her and let her in. Before Midnight we had already taken in at least five stays, in addition to two we had already adopted since the late 80's. Anyway, turned out a few weeks later Midnight was clearly pregnant. She gave birth to six babies on March 26th, 2007. We've been taking care of them ever since. Unfortunately the poor things although being completely indoor cats weren't handed the best genes by nature. They've all been wonderful kitties and our lives are enriched for the better by their presence.  :)
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Online RVR II

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #79 on: October 04, 2020, 11:51:06 AM »
Today would have been my late wife's 50th birthday..
Almost slipped by me until I was working on a long time customer's business taxes and had to sign them with today's date October 4. :(


Offline Charles Castle

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #80 on: October 04, 2020, 03:50:12 PM »
Today would have been my late wife's 50th birthday..
Almost slipped by me until I was working on a long time customer's business taxes and had to sign them with today's date October 4. :(
I hope your day goes as well as it can, given the circumstances.
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Offline Russoguru

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #81 on: October 06, 2020, 11:21:14 AM »
I've been in a fragile emotional state for several days now(it started last Thursday), but today was particularly bad. I'm not too worried about suicide anymore, but I am afraid however one day I am going to go through some kind of psychological trauma so bad that my body will just shut down and I will die, involuntarily. I know, I know, ridiculous concept, but I've heard of stranger things happening.

I wish my friends would realize that when I am depressed that the last thing I need is for them to be jumping on me just because I'm distant and I don't want to say anything that might hurt anybody's feelings.
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Online RoninFox

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #82 on: November 30, 2020, 10:21:47 AM »
Not considering the fact that this is the first holiday season after both of my parents have passed, I wound up watching A Christmas Story with my wife last night in between putting up our decorations.

I remember last year getting a little misty-eyed at the end of the movie when watching the lovely shot of the parents settling in at the end of the day to just watch the snow.

This time that same shot had me crying off and on for the next hour.
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Offline Cupcake

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #83 on: December 08, 2020, 08:29:04 PM »
I think my dad is getting his dog euthanized either tomorrow or the next day. The dog has lived a rough life, and he's been very loved and spoiled. He's had more staples/stitches than most people have. He's a fat grumpy old man, and we love him. It's not going to feel right having him gone.


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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #84 on: December 09, 2020, 05:52:02 PM »
Why did you create a thread about my life?


Online RVR II

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #85 on: January 10, 2021, 04:15:03 AM »
4 years ago this morning at 6:30am CST my late wife passed away and my life changed forever.. 4 days from today would have been our 20th anniversary :'(
I feel a lot better these days and think the sadness of this time of year might finally be behind me.
I work with a cousin of hers at the local post office and he's invited me to go with him to Mexico someday but I'm just not sure I'm ready yet or that I want to go back to that part of Mexico.. I really do miss the fun I had in December going to Iguala, Mexico and then going to Acapulco after the new year but it will never be the same. I may go visit other places like Cancun or other coastal cities someday and I've learned to never say never but I honestly don't think I'll ever go back to that part of Mexico again  :-[


Offline stansimpson

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Re: Return to the Sad Cafe
« Reply #86 on: January 10, 2021, 09:20:56 AM »
4 years ago this morning at 6:30am CST my late wife passed away and my life changed forever.. 4 days from today would have been our 20th anniversary :'(
I feel a lot better these days and think the sadness of this time of year might finally be behind me.
I work with a cousin of hers at the local post office and he's invited me to go with him to Mexico someday but I'm just not sure I'm ready yet or that I want to go back to that part of Mexico.. I really do miss the fun I had in December going to Iguala, Mexico and then going to Acapulco after the new year but it will never be the same. I may go visit other places like Cancun or other coastal cities someday and I've learned to never say never but I honestly don't think I'll ever go back to that part of Mexico again  :-[

 :'(

I know this has to be a hard time, RVR. I'm sorry for your loss, but I'm also glad to hear that the sadness might be behind you.