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Author Topic: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown  (Read 55264 times)

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Offline Tripe

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #150 on: July 01, 2012, 07:22:09 AM »
Also, I like the fact that the sexy character comes from a race that looks like a corpse with a fax machine stapled to it.
Liked for this, possibly the most succinct description of the Borg ever.


Offline goflyblind

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #151 on: July 01, 2012, 07:22:56 AM »
Umm... what was that sound you just made?  Oh, the NAME Hugh.  Please use capitals.  Otherwise it sounds like inappropriate grunting.

no way, i'm like e. e. cummings and shit.
dF = 0
d*F = J


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #152 on: July 01, 2012, 09:11:40 AM »
Umm... what was that sound you just made?  Oh, the NAME Hugh.  Please use capitals.  Otherwise it sounds like inappropriate grunting.

no way, i'm like e. e. cummings and shit.

Or Cormac McCarthy.


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #153 on: July 01, 2012, 09:13:52 AM »
19. Dwarf
(75 points, on 5 of 23 lists - Top Vote #3 by Therul)


   

Genus: Homo Geologic

n Germanic mythology, a dwarf (Old English dweorg, Old Norse dvergr, Old High German zwerc and gitwerc) is a being that dwells in mountains and in the earth, and is associated with wisdom, smithing, mining, and crafting. Dwarfs are also sometimes described as short and ugly, although some scholars have questioned whether this is a later development stemming from comical portrayals of the beings.

The etymology of the word dwarf is contested, and scholars have proposed varying theories about the origins of the being, including that dwarfs may have originated as nature spirits or beings associated with death, or as a mixture of concepts. Competing etymologies include a basis in the Indo-European root *dheur- (meaning "damage"), the Indo-European root *dhreugh (whence modern GermanTraum/English dream and trug "deception"), and comparisons have been made with Sanskrit dhvaras (a type of demonic being).

Norse mythology, as recorded in the Poetic Edda (compiled in the 13th century from earlier traditional sources) and the Prose Edda (written by Snorri Sturluson in the 13th century) provide different mythical origins for the beings. The Poetic Edda poem Völuspá details that the dwarfs were the product of the primordial blood of the being Brimir and the bones of Bláinn. The Prose Edda, however, describes dwarfs as beings similar to maggots that festered in the flesh of the primal being Ymir before being gifted with reason by the gods. The Poetic Edda and Prose Edda contain over 100 dwarf names (sort of a proto-John Hodgman), while the Prose Edda gives the four dwarfs Norðri, Suðri, Austri and Vestri a cosmological role – they hold up the sky. In addition, scholars have noted that the Svartálfar, who, like dwarfs, are said in the Prose Edda to dwell in Svartálfaheimr, appear to be the same beings as dwarfs. Very few actual dwarf characters appear in the Poetic Edda and Prose Edda and have quite diverse roles: murderous creators of the mead of poetry, 'reluctant donors' of important artifacts with magical qualities, or sexual predators who lust after goddesses.

Some scholars have proposed that the Poetic Edda poem Völuspá may contain an account of the first human beings, Ask and Embla, as having been created by dwarfs. A preceding stanza to the account of the creation of Ask and Embla in Völuspá provides a catalog of dwarf names, and stanza 10 has been read as describing the creation of human forms from the earth. This may potentially mean that dwarfs formed humans, and that the three gods gave them life.

After the Christianization of the Germanic peoples, tales of dwarfs continued to be told in the folklore of areas of Europe where Germanic languages were (and are) spoken.

 Notable representatives:
Gimli, Thorin Oakenshield, Livinia Warren

   

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with your host, Charles Darwin

Though very much like a squat human, Dwarves have adapted their lungs to deal with the stale dank air of their underground caverns, which is also useful in surviving turnip burps, even if their canaries (or “sky moles”) do not.


MontyServo

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #154 on: July 01, 2012, 10:10:16 AM »




 ;D I love how uncomfortable his smile is.

That's the smile of a man just realizing that he will be selling autographs to sweaty, unpleasant smelling Trek fans for $20 a pop for the rest of his life.


Offline Darth Geek

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #155 on: July 01, 2012, 10:13:59 AM »

That's the smile of a man just realizing that he will be selling autographs to sweaty, unpleasant smelling Trek fans for $20 a pop for the rest of his life.
And doing it all for a character nobody seems to like.



Russell

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #156 on: July 01, 2012, 01:17:51 PM »
Now I am curious if the Razor-toed spine masher is going to appear on the list... Daltysmith? Where are you? Only you would get these references and for you to not reply to them is making me look kinda like a jackass. :)


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #157 on: July 01, 2012, 01:29:30 PM »
18. Transformer
(75 points, on 6 of 23 lists - Top Vote #3 by Pak Man)


   

Genus: Car

Transformers is an entertainment franchise created by Hasbro. Beginning with the Transformers toy line, the franchise centers on factions of transforming alien robots (often the Autobots and the Decepticons) in an endless struggle for dominance or eventual peace. In its decades-long history, the franchise has expanded to encompass comic books, animation, video games and films.

Notable representatives:
Optimus Prime, Megatron, Soundwave, Bumblebee

   

For the Dar-Win!
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Very few people know that the HMS Beagle was a transformer.  In fact, this is why we called it the Beagle.  It turned into a large wooden beagle.  We had to put it down after it kept eating the Galapagos turtles we were studying (another little known fact: they were ninja turtles).


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #158 on: July 01, 2012, 02:37:04 PM »
17. Skeksis
(76 points, on 5 of 23 lists - Top Vote #4 by CJones)


   

Genus: Cathartes Vulgaris

The Skeksis are a fictional species which act as the main antagonists in the 1982 fantasy film The Dark Crystal, its companion book The World of The Dark Crystal and theTokyoPop prequel Legends of the Dark Crystal. They are described by concept artist Brian Froud as, "... part reptile, part predatory bird, part dragon." In the film, the Skeksis are represented by puppets engineered under the direction of Jim Henson. Jim Henson said that in the development of the Skeksis, the creators drew inspiration from the Seven Deadly Sins.

The skeksis are tall bipeds combining both avian and reptilian physical features. They all wear elaborate but threadbare robes of lace, velvet, and brocade which apparently keep the skeksis' constantly decomposing bodies intact and make them look larger and more intimidating. Their heads are beaked like a vulture's, while simultaneously sporting curved fangs. They have bloated bellies and long reptilian tails, as well as curved quills on their backs. Like their urRu counterparts, they have two pairs of arms, yet in the skeksis, only one pair is functional, the other being atrophied. Despite their frail appearance, Skeskis are powerful creatures: skekUng, during the Haakskeeka, manages to destroy a block of rock with his sword, and skekSil single-handedly smashed down a pilaster of rock on Jen.

The Skeksis are the corrupt rulers of the planet Thra, having inherited it from their benevolent UrSkek predecessors. They are the embodiments of the knowledgeable, yet unrestrained parts of the UrSkeks souls. The Skeksis culture favors repetitive flamboyance, emotional pettiness, and a wasteful attitude toward life. Though they are capable of forming alliances, they are by nature extremely paranoid toward each other.

Notable representatives:
Emperor (skekSo), Chamberlain (skekSil), Scientist (skekTek)
   

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The UrSkek were one of the few races able to divide themselves into 2 separate species.  Together they are powerful, but for some reason they thought it would be a good idea if half of them where senile hippies and the other half rancid, world-ruining vultures.  Great plan, guys.


Offline wurwolf

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #159 on: July 01, 2012, 02:58:43 PM »
Notable representatives:
Optimus Prime, Megatron, Soundwave, Bumblebee


My daughter would be so pleased to see you include Soundwave on the most notable list. He is her favorite, and that's saying something because she has been completely obsessed with Transformers for years.
Bonhead #2
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Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #160 on: July 01, 2012, 03:44:43 PM »
I think we can all agree that Soundwave is by far the best decepticon.  I think it's because he doesn't waste time with unnecessary words or doesn't give you any crap.  I don't think that any decepticon has anything to say about Soundwave.  I mean, I'm sure a real fan could correct me on this, but I don't think Starscream even badmouthed him, and he's a dick.


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #161 on: July 01, 2012, 03:46:50 PM »
16. Dalek
(78 points, on 6 of 23 lists - Top Vote #4 by Smith Dr John Smith)


   

Genus: Skaros Exterminatos

The Daleks are a fictional extraterrestrial race of mutants from the British science fiction television series Doctor Who. Within the series, Daleks are cyborgs made from their original forms, extraterrestrial Kaleds (Seriously?) from the planet Skaro, genetically modified and integrated within a tank-like robotic mechanical shell. They were created by the scientist Davros during the final years of a thousand-year war against the Thals. The Daleks are a powerful race bent on universal conquest and domination, utterly without pity, compassion or remorse. Various storylines portray them as having had every emotion removed except hate, leaving them with a desire to purge the Universe of all non-Dalek life. Collectively they are the greatest enemies of the series' protagonist, the Time Lord known as the Doctor.

Externally, Daleks normally resemble human-sized salt and pepper shakers with a single mechanical eyestalk mounted on a rotating dome, a gun mount containing an energy weapon (or "death ray") and a telescopic manipulator arm which is usually tipped by an appendage resembling a sink plunger. Daleks have been seen to be able to use their plungers to interface with technology, crush a man's skull by suction, measure the intelligence of a subject, and extract information from a man's mind. Dalek casings are made of a bonded polycarbide material dubbed "dalekanium" (Seriously?) by a member of the human resistance in The Dalek Invasion of Earth and by the Cult of Skaro in "Daleks in Manhattan".

The lower half of a Dalek's shell is covered with hemispherical protrusions, or "Dalek bumps", which are shown in the episode "Dalek" to be spheres embedded in the casing.  Both the BBC-licensed Dalek Book (1964) and The Doctor Who Technical Manual (1983) describe these items as being part of a sensory array, whilst in the 2005 series episode "Dalek", they are shown to serve a function in a Dalek's self-destruct mechanism. Their armour has a forcefield that evaporates most bullets and resists most types of energy weapon; this seems to be concentrated around the Dalek's midsection (where the mutant is located), as normally ineffective firepower can be concentrated on the eyestalk to blind a Dalek. Daleks have a very limited field of vision, with no peripheral sight at all, and are relatively easy to hide from in fairly exposed places.

Notable representatives:
Generally, they don’t have names, with a few rare exceptions.
   

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Arguably the most hate-filled creature in existence, the only goal of the dalek races is to destroy any other race that exists.  I’m sure once that happens they’ll mellow out and stop being evil.  That’ll be a good day.


Russell

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #162 on: July 01, 2012, 04:08:06 PM »
Anyone else think Davros and Captain Pike were separated at birth twins?


Offline Johnny Unusual

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #163 on: July 01, 2012, 04:25:52 PM »
15. Werewolf
(84 points, on 6 of 23 lists - Top Vote #1 by Wurwolf)


   

Genus: Homo Canis

A werewolf, also known as a lycanthrope (from the Greek λυκάνθρωπος: λύκος, lukos, "wolf", and ἄνθρωπος, anthrōpos, "man"), is a mythological or folkloric human with the ability to shapeshift into a wolf or an anthropomorphic wolf-like creature, either purposely or after being placed under a curse and/or lycanthropic affliction via a bite or scratch from a werewolf, or some other means. This transformation is often associated with the appearance of the full moon, as popularly noted by the medieval chronicler Gervase of Tilbury, and perhaps in earlier times among the ancient Greeks through the writings of Petronius.

In addition to the natural characteristics inherent to both wolves and humans, werewolves are often attributed strength and speed far beyond those of wolves or men. The werewolf is generally held as a European character, although its lore spread through the world in later times. Shape-shifters, similar to werewolves, are common in tales from all over the world, most notably amongst the Native Americans, though most of them involve animal forms other than wolves.

Werewolves are a frequent subject of modern fiction, although fictional werewolves have been attributed traits distinct from those of original folklore. For example, the ideas that werewolves are only vulnerable to silver bullets or that they can cause others to become werewolves by biting or wounding them derive from works of modern fiction. Werewolves continue to endure in modern culture and fiction, with books, films and television shows cementing the werewolf's stance as a dominant figure in horror.

Notable representatives:
Lawrence Talbot, David Naughton, Wolfman Jack
   

For the Dar-Win!
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There wolf!  Haha.  We have fun, don’t we?


Russell

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Re: List of Crap 61: Top 50 Fictional Species/Races Countdown
« Reply #164 on: July 01, 2012, 04:32:33 PM »
Don't forget Jacobs, he's by far the most credible representative of the werewolves.