Top 50 iRiffs

[Asbestos Bill]

And a cooked goose! For Everyone! Ah ha ha!

[D.B. Barnes]

#8a
Ronin Fox Trax - A Nightmare on Elm Street 3
(Total Points: 74    Number of Lists: 5  Highest Ranking: #1 Anais.whatever)

My favorite of the Nightmare riffs. Well-written and well-performed throughout.

NIGHTMARE ON ELM STREET PART III REVIEW – Seven Voyages of Bill Maar…RATED R!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

While I do miss the riffing talents of Dannuc, these two have great chemistry together. This riff is on par with Masters of the Universe with very good writing, excellent performances and great sound quality. Good joke density with zero dead spots which is an improvement over the first two Nightmare riffs. This riff is consistently funny; I never lost interest and laughed out loud numerous times.

Part III seems like a better movie than the first two, yet it has this really goofy quality to it that the riffers make good use of. Plenty of great references to music, TV, movies, politics and pop culture in general. It helps if you watch the first two Nightmares because there are some hilarious callbacks to the previous two installments, especially Moist Boy from Part II. I’m really looking forward to Part IV. Please bring back Dannuc if at all possible!!!

Laugh-out-loud moments:

Last house on the desk
Sister Potato Chip
Giant remote control
Bourbon hose!
STD count
Terence Howard

For what it's worth, I definitely recommend this iRiff. The laughs-a-plenty will not disappoint.

#2
Ice on Mars - The Lizzie McGuire Movie
(Total Points: 108    Number of Lists: 6  Highest Ranking: #1 LucasM)

I can't even put into words how awesome and unexpected it is to see this come in at #2. I had it at #2 and seriously considered putting it at #1. Hive fives to everyone who recognized the genius of this riff.  Simply awesome. Oh, and I declare this the winner of the Highest Degree of Difficulty Award.

THE LIZZY MCGUIRE MOVIE REVIEW - This Movie Could Really Use a Montage or Two

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

It took me a while to get around to this one, but I’m stoked I finally checked it out. This is just fucking great! There are obviously people who are not going to go for this, but if you’re one of those people, you most likely didn’t get past the sample. If you’re like me and there’s a dark, perverted side to your sense of humor, I have a feeling you will really enjoy this. This riff pulls no punches and that’s one of the reasons I liked it so much. Just when you think they can’t go any further, they do. Oh yes, they go there…and there, and there and everywhere. But don’t get me wrong, the jokes aren’t just filthy, they’re smart and savvy.

Smart and savvy is also a good way to describe the riffers. What a great performance! The chemistry is off the charts. It sounds as if these two have been doing this forever. They are so in sync with each other and having such a good time while delivering winner after winner. A particular performance standout is Ari as Alex Bornstein as the Principal…classic! Michael’s self-deprecating comments regarding his varying accent are also really funny. And the constant mocking of Lizzie’s dolphin noises is great. It’s one of those things that you’d think would get old but the rate at which the actress employs it just heightens the hilarity. These guys have a really good eye, too. There are quite a few riffs on props or stuff going on in the background that you would never notice.

Oh yeah, I CAN’T BELIEVE I WATCHED THE LIZZIE MCGUIRE MOVIE!!!

Laugh-out-loud moments (way too many to list):

The switch to the ‘real’ commentary
Escalating clichéd movie lines ending with Brokeback Mountain
Cats intro
Lodged Tupperware
Stand-up routine
Principal’s box monologue
Benadryl!!!
Jaundice!!!
Six Flags!

I highly recommend this iRiff. And a note to the riffers: PLEASE do another movie in this genre. It seems as if Hannah Montana or something like that would make for perfect fodder.

Oh, and keep the track running at the end. There are hilarious bloopers and a really funny bit that’s just the two riffers chatting. The fast-food commercial stuff had me rollin’!

And the winner...number one with a bullet laserblast to the crotch...is:
#1
Ronin Fox Trax - Masters of the Universe
(Total Points: 112    Number of Lists: 5  Highest Ranking: #1 Artie)

Wow! This is unexpected...but incredibly awesome and very much deserved. Easily my favorite of all the RFT riffs. It was the perfect storm of having the right movie and the right riffers come together for pure comedy gold.

Having written extensively for this riff, imma take a moment to bask in the glory just a little...*bask* *bask* *bask* - DAT BASK!!!

Huge congrats to Ronin, anais, DraCCu, and all the writers.

MASTERS OF THE UNIVERSE REVIEW - Darth Fabulous!!!

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

Very funny stuff, indeed. The performance was great; the addition of Anais adds yet another dimension to an already great team. She fits right in and does a fantastic job. The chemistry between the three riffers is excellent. The delivery is natural and the jokes deliver time and time again; this is one of the most consistently funny iRiffs I’ve heard. The riffing flows well with no noticeable gaps. The Gwildor and Skeletor impressions are excellent. This is an over-the-top goofy movie which is pretty entertaining on its own and downright hilarious with the riff. This riff is funny AND very fun. Good stuff! Excellent audio quality.

Laugh-out-loud moments (among many others):

"He pulled his acting muscle."
Timeshare
Robby's Ribs n' Chicken shakes
“Zen dwarf bullshit!”
Jack White as Kate Moss
“Bam!!!”

For what it's worth, I highly recommend this iRiff. You won’t be disappointed.

Massive props to DG for driving the bus on this one. You went above and beyond the call of duty throughout the whole process. Awesome job!!! 

[k1]

Just ask DG to send it to you. I'm sure he has it.

Yes, I just got mine back...

1. Quiptracks - Van Helsing.
2. Hor-Riff-ic  Productions - Leprechaun.
3. Riff Raff Theater - Die Hard.
4. Mr. B. Natural - Cat Women of the Moon.
5. Corny Commentaries - The Phantom Empire Chapter 4.
6. Heated Seats Presents - Marked for Death.
7. The Turkey Shoot with Scott Zee - Spooks Run Wild.
8. Ronin Fox Trax - Nightmare on Elm Street 3.
9. J.C. Walsh - Red Riding Hood.
10. Josh Way - Laser Mission.
11. Cinester Theater - Back to the Future

I had thought I had placed the G.I. Joe by OneWallCinema on my list.  I had intended to, but its exclusion was an oversight.  Still, it made the list anyway, so no harm done, right?  Right? 

We are revoking your cartoon life insurance policy and sending over a laser rifle.

[Darth Geek]

We are revoking your cartoon life insurance policy and sending over a laser rifle.

Given how effective those proved to be...I don't see the issue.

[Scott_Zee]

Also, also wik..

My congratulations to everyone and all their hard work creating all these great riffs. It's certainly not the easiest gig in the world.  But you kinda feel like you're cleaning up after somebody else's mess so that no others should be offended by it. Or at least not have to smell it so much.

Keep'em coming folks.

[Darth Geek]

Also, also wik..

My congratulations to everyone and all their hard work creating all these great riffs. It's certainly not the easiest gig in the world.  But you kinda feel like you're cleaning up after somebody else's mess so that no others should be offended by it. Or at least not have to smell it so much.

Keep'em coming folks.

Yes! That's right. We are the Febreeze of the movie industry.

[D.B. Barnes]

Oh yeah, da' list.

1. Lady in the Water - AWARD: Best Introductory iRiff for N00bs
2. The Lizzy McGuire Movie - AWARD: Highest Degree of Difficulty
3. Ice Pirates
4. Masters of the Universe
5. Friday the 13th: Part III
6. League of Extraordinary Gentlemen
7. BURN-E - AWARD: Most Creative Use of the Medium
8. HULK
9. Gremlins
10. AVP   
11. The Snow Creature   
12. G.I. JOE: The Movie
13. Nightmare on Elm Street Part III
14. FROGS
15. The Happening
16. Lost In Space         
17. Friday the 13th: Part IV
18. Terminator: Salvation
19. Minority Report
20. Halloween III
21. The Last Airbender   
22. Nightmare on Elm Street Part V
23. Halloween II
24. Congo
25. Bunny

[Darth Geek]

25. Bunny

When I saw that on your list, my first thought was "Oh please God tell me noone riffed The Brown Bunny!"

[D.B. Barnes]

Also, also wik..

My congratulations to everyone and all their hard work creating all these great riffs. It's certainly not the easiest gig in the world.  But you kinda feel like you're cleaning up after somebody else's mess so that no others should be offended by it. Or at least not have to smell it so much.

Keep'em coming folks.

Yes! That's right. We are the Febreeze of the movie industry.

"I thought I smelled something down here."

[zenmichael]

Seriously, thanks to everyone who voted for our stuff. I know we haven't come out with anything in quite awhile, and I'm so seriously stoked that people still dig our stuff after such a long hiatus. If anyone's curious, we DO have items in the works, there are just ... many things ... stopping them from getting done. Mostly my own laziness, I freely admit, and the fact that YouTube shut down our page and blah blah blah. I've been doing incredibly geeky book reviews etc. on YouTube under the new name of rolereviewsal so if anyone is like, 'man, *I* want to listen to Michael blather on about geeky subjects for hours and hours,' YOUR MOMENT HAS ARRIVED.

Also, I've been helping out with some QuipTracks stuff on the side. Who could forget all my additions to "Signs"? (read: "bears." Literally the word "bears")

A big thing this list did was make me sad all over again that Ari's not my friend anymore ... but c'est la vie. And we've been raiding even more high schools with promise of drink and stardom if--I mean, uh ... HARVESTING NEW TALENT ... so all should be good in the future!

[CJones]

For what it's worth, here's mine

1 Jurassic Park, 5th anniversery, Absolutely the Last One Edition, by Quiptracks. Easily one of my all time favorite riffs, by anybody. "You don't see too many three stall unisex bathrooms anymore.", "I'm more upset by the fact that those toilets weren't hooked up to anything." Also, "Bow down before Coragale, God of Boxes!", "May he return us to Sender...
2 Star Trek: The motion Picture, by Ronin Fox (thank you to Anais for recommending this. I forgot how slow this movie was, but the riff is excellent) "Ah, finally, the fanboy equivalent of a Playboy centerfold","With the scaffolding as those annoying staples.", "Spock had more charisma in that episode where he lost his brain.", and "It's impossibe to get lost if you have no idea where you're going."
3 GI Joe, by One Wall Cinema. "THEY SET, THE SNOW, ON FIRE!", and "Keep splicing! We need a tomato that tastes like a cornish game hen!" (Hey, is that a laser gun?)
4 Signs, by Quiptracks "Why can't the nerds get girlfriends?", "Because they never put the high rolls on Charisma. Geeks FTW!"
5 Friday the 13th (the new version), by Hor-RIFF-ic Productions. "Come on stud, I want you to Kum in my Bayah", "Eww.."
6 Van Helsing, by Quiptracks. "Who lights these things.. and why", "Oh it's Ye old missile silo."
7 Red Riding Hood, by JC Walsh. "...where as in Twilight... Billy Burke had a mustashe." Also, "Let me get my hammer, then we'll have three tools."
8 Voyager: Eye of the Neddle, by Quiptracks. "Arms at maximum akimbosity!". Plus: "A Room with a moose!"[/b]
9 Drive Angry (in 2D), by JC Walsh "Did really only one guy have a gun? This is Oklahoma!", and "It's a good thing the Rapture was yesterday." <---- I'm surprised this didn't make it
10 The Forgotten, by Quiptracks
11 Dune, by Ronin Fox "It's an army of M. Bisons", "OF COURSE! two three four..."
12 The Core, by Quiptracks "Was that a fish?"
13 Lady in the Water, by Quiptracks
14 Equilibrium, by Quiptraks. "Here's your Melancholy Meal."
15 The last Airbender, by Quiptracks. "They lost him already!?"
16 Voyager: Pilot, by Ice on Mars
17 Dragonball Evolution, by Quiptracks
18 Sky Captain, and the World of Tomorrow, by Quiptracks
19 Godzilla, by QT
20 Hulk, by QT
21 Legend of Chun-Li, by QT
22 GATTACA, by QT
23 Mission Impossible 2, by QT
24 The Happening, by QT
25 Dune, by Spoony

I'd never even heard of Turkey Shoot before this. That's another one I'll have to try. I guess that was the whole point of this list though, to find out what's worth trying.

I wanted to try Masters of the Universe. I bought the track, but I couldn't find a copy of the DVD. I tried downloading it, but it just didn't sync up.

Anyway, this was a fantastic LoC. My favorite to date in fact. Great job Darth Geek!  And thank you to the surprisingly high number of people who participated.

[Asbestos Bill]

I'd never even heard of Turkey Shoot before this. That's another one I'll have to try. I guess that was the whole point of this list though, to find out what's worth trying.

You know what...I think I might just send out coupons to all the QuipTracks customers to urge everyone to try a group they haven't before. I'll have to check with all of them, but I doubt they'll mind...

[CJones]

9 Drive Angry (in 2D), by JC Walsh "Did really only one guy have a gun? This is Oklahoma!"  <---- I'm surprised this didn't make it

"It's a good thing the Rapture was yesterday."

The Accountant (who's awesome BTW), is driving on the wrong side of the road, on a two lane highway... on a BRIDGE. And there is absolutely no one else on the road.

And there was a similar riff earlier "Apparently Colorado is deserted"

Also: "Denny's BACONLOCOST!"

[the amazing zero]

just curious.... basically i hope i'm not starting anything buttt. did you llimit your list to stuff you watched or where there other people involved. just curious because i saw a lot of similar types of flix on this list ad thought to myself i saw a lot of good stuff that might been not in your the areas that came up. so I was wandering what was the selection process for your pics. i'm just asking because i am curiouds to know how i can end up on the list next time. I mean i have several iriffs and want to improve my work. now i am rambeling and so I will stop.

[Coragale]

"Bow down before Coragale, God of Boxes!"

My favorite line in that entire track, and I *THINK* it's been there since the old first edition. Hence my name on this and many games.