Growing up in the 80s, I learned that stuff like this was buried quickly and never heard from again.. Till now :speechless:
I learned that protracted scenes of scenery and vans driving down roads don't make for as riveting cinema as some may think.
I learned that Satan was even more of a pissant little weenie than I already knew it to be.
I learned yet again that not all guys with long hair who don't have beards and mustaches are attractive. Triton Dude wasn't so bad above the neck, but that steroid-y bod...ewwwwwwww gag projectile vomit!
I learned that when I chose to live most of the 1980s in a '60s style commune, I missed NOTHING.
I learned that the movie "Rock 'n' Roll Nightmare" was called "The Edge of Hell".
I learned that the Tritons love to rock, that they rock around the clock, and, most importantly, that their kind of music is never gonna stop.
I learned that it takes 23 minutes to lock up a van.
I learned that getting killed by Satan makes you a better drummer and sexual partner.
I learned that Satan is like a turtle: knock him on his back and he will have a hard time getting back up.
I learned "Thou shalt not take part in Bad Scenes".
There's no way they didn't know that was on the wall. Did they mean movie scenes, or like the 80's "scene"? Either way, they did it anyway.
I learned Mike, Kevin and Bill get VERY emotionally attached to vehicles and buildings very quickly.
I learned that the Clouds and Moon are bitter rivals.
I learned that it's possible to make the fight scenes in The Guy From Harlem and Wonder Women look like a heavyweight title bout.
A fake aussie Duke Nukem existed in the 80s, Even then, B-movie quotes made up much of his dialog.
Barns are well-suited to house recording studios. And basements.
Establishing shots that show constant passing traffic slightly undermine the sense of isolation you spent a few scenes (plus the credits) to set up.
Dina Lohan was buff in the 80s.
When a movie cuts away from one shot to another and then back to the original, no time need pass in the original shot, setting the second shot in a parallel dimension where, presumably, those events occurred.
I learned that you can find someone by discovering a missing van.
I learned that a spiked codpiece can totally redeem a movie after a bland first hour and fifteen minutes.
I learned that sometimes when they say a movie is "good to watch stoned", they mean you'll be hoping an angry mob of Philistines stones you to death so you don't have to WATCH THAT DAMN VAN DRIVE AROUND ANY LONGER!!!
I think i learned i liked Jon Mikl Thor better when he was playing a Zombie.
I learned that making ten minutes of rock can take weeks.
Quote from: Bob on July 07, 2015, 06:39:05 PM
I learned that making ten minutes of rock can take weeks.
When done well, yes I could see that. I have no idea what is taking these idiots so long, though.
Quote from: RedZoneTuba on June 15, 2015, 11:32:06 AM
I learned that sometimes when they say a movie is "good to watch stoned", they mean you'll be hoping an angry mob of Philistines stones you to death so you don't have to WATCH THAT DAMN VAN DRIVE AROUND ANY LONGER!!!
I learned that the only reason they did it was to pad the run time by another ten minutes.
I learn that Satan should have bow down to Jon Mikl Thor Nipples. Even if they are a little flabby now a days.
Quote from: Trekker4747 on June 09, 2015, 05:29:45 PM
I learned that you can find someone by discovering a missing van.
THAT'S an understatement
I learned that when a character is named Stig, Top Gear references are nowhere to be found.
I learned that angel god beings like to play coy, slapstick games with demons before they battle them for the fate of humanity.
I learned that "oh those people where just shadows I created for your amusement, characters from a horror movie" works as a time-saver to retroactively justify all your bad acting, stupid decisions, and unlikeable stock characters. It has almost as much audience-insulting quality as "it was all a dream", and people will be so distracted by John Mikl Thor's nipples and chainmail underwear that you don't need to worry that it fails to hold up to scrutiny in retrospect.
I learned that somebody spent time and effort to make a demonic version of a chin puppet.
I really don't get the logic of it all being staged. I mean... What? For who's benefit? To what end? I mean.... What?!
Quote from: Trekker4747 on September 11, 2015, 04:22:35 PM
I really don't get the logic of it all being staged. I mean... What? For who's benefit? To what end? I mean.... What?!
Turns out, God likes to troll Satan.
I learned what it might be like if the guys riffed softcore pornography.
Didn't learn much else. It's kind of a bland movie. At least it's in color.
Really? Bland is not the way I'd descibe this movie. Certainly not in the last act where our rocker hero reveals himself to be a muscle man angel wrestling with star fish and battling a barely articulate (in the action figure sense of the word) satan. I mean, it is BAD, but I wouldn't call it bland.
Quote from: Johnny Unusual on October 01, 2017, 05:46:47 AM
Really? Bland is not the way I'd descibe this movie. Certainly not in the last act where our rocker hero reveals himself to be a muscle man angel wrestling with star fish and battling a barely articulate (in the action figure sense of the word) satan. I mean, it is BAD, but I wouldn't call it bland.
It just took that kind of un-memorable formula that all slasher movies take.
- Start out with a certain number of characters.
- Kill the characters off one by one.
- When there is only one or two left, the movie is almost over.
I've never seen a slasher movie that could break out of this pattern, which is why the whole genre bores me so much.
I learned that Jokes mocking Tumblr could be funny even to SJWs like me.