I learned the makers of this movie don't know jack about Greek mythology. Lamia was a daughter of Zeus who ate children. Somehow that translates into male goat demon who takes people to hell (a concept that didn't even exist in Greek mythology).
Also, I learned Allison Lohman bears a striking resemblnace to my sister. Especially in the chipmunk cheeks department... Don't tell her I said that :-[
And finally... AIM FOR THE GOAT YOU DUMBASS!
It wasn't actually a goat demon was it? It only went into the goat because that's the animal they brought in? Or did I miss some "subtlety" because I only watched this POS riffed?
Anyway, I learned that Stu would have never survived in General Patton's army.
And I learned that it was very foolish to attempt to buy this riff the night of the first live show. All those people getting online to get their free digital goodies jacked up the servers so badly that, though my purchase went through, I wasn't allowed to access this riff file until today.
Quote from: CJones on December 12, 2009, 06:01:36 PM
And finally... AIM FOR THE GOAT YOU DUMBASS!
Yeah, that was the stupidest part of a very stupid movie. Dude, you're standing six inches away from a goat who's leashed down ... and you miss? What the hell was that?!?
I learned that because of the Evil Dead movies, Sam Raimi has open license to make shitty horror movies and be praised for it.
LMFAO!
Quote from: ShadowDog on December 21, 2009, 07:14:39 PM
Yeah, that was the stupidest part of a very stupid movie. Dude, you're standing six inches away from a goat who's leashed down ... and you miss? What the hell was that?!?
Next time use chain link and you won't have this problem..
I also learned that old people ooze goo and fluids like a fountain that come in all sort of tinges of yellow green
I just learned that Thrifty has the ability to close threads. Whoa.
actually if you start a thread you can lock it..
For real? Holy crap! That's the first I've ever heard of that shit and I've been using message boards for a solid ten years now. So far back that they didn't move when you replied to them. LMFAO Anyway, wow, that's news to me, no sarcasm.
Quote from: ShadowDog on December 31, 2009, 01:35:55 PM
For real? Holy crap! That's the first I've ever heard of that shit and I've been using message boards for a solid ten years now. So far back that they didn't move when you replied to them. LMFAO Anyway, wow, that's news to me, no sarcasm.
It's not too odd that you'd be surprised. I mean, what wuss locks their own thread?
The reasoning for locking the thread seemed clear to me.
It was meant to be a discussion of the merits/demerits of the movie, yet
the main argument used by the movie's supporters was 'You just don't get it.'
Clearly nothing was to be gained from further discussion, except pointless fighting.
Since this site is devoid of moderators, I think it's a perfectly reasonable thing to
lock a thread you've created when you realize it's accomplishing nothing or is starting
to do more harm than good.
I learned that the bureaucracy of eternal damnnation worse than the Texas legal system. Does Hell have an appellate court?
Also, Hell's fire is so hot that your face starts to burn off seconds before you're actually dragged down. So it's possible that you'll burn eternally, but all of your pain receptors will be nullified almost immediately, so it should cancel out.
Oh, and all horror movie protagonists must be hot women. Otherwise the White Knight impulses of the male members of the audience won't kick in and root for an otherwise boring leading lady.
Jaw-sucking is the preferred martial art for old hags.
Funerals will inevitably have a Mr. Bean moment where someone knocks the corpse off the table.
The Roma have a strict No Fatties policy.
Hellmouths will conveniently open any time the damned person happens to be horizontal on the ground or a ground-like surface.
And of course, I learned an age-old moral maxim: never piss off Gypsies.
Quote from: cfkane on February 10, 2010, 10:18:05 AM
I learned that the bureaucracy of eternal damnnation worse than the Texas legal system. Does Hell have an appellate court?
The gypsy gave her a really bad Community Chest card: Go directly to Hell. Do not pass God, do not collect $200.
I just learned today that super hawt and tasty Ellen Page was originally supposed to play the lead in this movie but had to drop out at the last minute because of a scheduling conflict. (though part of me wonders if she saw the final draft of the script and hurriedly created a conflict. LMFAO)
This movie would have been bearable with Ellen Page as the lead.
Quote from: ShadowDog on February 10, 2010, 04:11:24 PM
I just learned today that super hawt and tasty Ellen Page was originally supposed to play the lead in this movie but had to drop out at the last minute because of a scheduling conflict. (though part of me wonders if she saw the final draft of the script and hurriedly created a conflict. LMFAO)
Considering that the "scheduling conflict" was that she said she had to re-grout her bathroom...
LMFAO
Quote from: dvorak on January 11, 2010, 10:31:54 AM
The reasoning for locking the thread seemed clear to me.
It was meant to be a discussion of the merits/demerits of the movie, yet
the main argument used by the movie's supporters was 'You just don't get it.'
Clearly nothing was to be gained from further discussion, except pointless fighting.
Since this site is devoid of moderators, I think it's a perfectly reasonable thing to
lock a thread you've created when you realize it's accomplishing nothing or is starting
to do more harm than good.
That's indeed why. Grug was starting to piss me off, and I was reaching Doctor Who levels of wound up-edness.
I kinda thought Paranormal Activity would have similar defenders. I'm surprised since we announced it, by how many people I've seen who were equally frustrated/disgusted by it as I was.
Quote from: Conor on February 11, 2010, 10:37:26 AM
I kinda thought Paranormal Activity would have similar defenders. I'm surprised since we announced it, by how many people I've seen who were equally frustrated/disgusted by it as I was.
It's so similart to Blair Witch that I think it would be equally as polarizing. On the other hand, it's not as popular as Blair Witch, so that's a mitigating factor. I thought the movie as a whole was just boring, until the very last scene which did genuinely startle me. It might have been better if Micah wasn't such an utterly detestable character.
I learned that the Sam Raimi I was a fan of apparently just went into hibernation while some other Raimi directed the Spiderman films.
And that according to movies and TV shows, Hungarian is apparently the creepiest language in the world.
Great, now I've got the image of the "old" Sam Raimi climbing out of the "new" Sam Raimi's mouth...Stupid me.
Quote from: Thrifty on February 11, 2010, 07:12:37 AM
Quote from: dvorak on January 11, 2010, 10:31:54 AM
The reasoning for locking the thread seemed clear to me.
It was meant to be a discussion of the merits/demerits of the movie, yet
the main argument used by the movie's supporters was 'You just don't get it.'
Clearly nothing was to be gained from further discussion, except pointless fighting.
Since this site is devoid of moderators, I think it's a perfectly reasonable thing to
lock a thread you've created when you realize it's accomplishing nothing or is starting
to do more harm than good.
That's indeed why. Grug was starting to piss me off, and I was reaching Doctor Who levels of wound up-edness.
So. Late to the game, but I figured since I posted over at Paranormal I should check out the Drag Me as well.
I have to say, if a thread is titled as divisively as "So, did we learn anything from this movie?" it's clearly not looking for a discussion of the merits/demerits. Not being able to see Grug's responses, I can only guess that they ran to the personal attack variety. Fair enough, boot those comments and lock the thread. There's no call to get jerky with a dude. But please, don't act like you started a genuine discussion thread for the sake of hearing out someone's argument in favor of the film. I'd gladly go into the merits, but I have a feeling that I'd be ignored/dismissed. So there's really no point. I'm only responding here because I don't like the "I was just skipping down the sidewalk, minding my own business" attitude. You want to rag on the film, that's your right. Just be honest about it.
What you're talking about didn't even happen in this thread. That one was locked.
Perhaps if you actually took the time to look at the 8 or 10 threads on this subsection
and noticed, especially since the post here that mentions it says it was a locked thread,
then perhaps your opinion might be more valued.
The discussion was ended, and should be left ended.
In response to what Conor said, I believe the reason that Drag Me to Hell
and Paranormal Activity don't have similar defenders can be summed up
in two words: Sam Raimi
He made Evil Dead. It's hard not to like him, but
I hate this movie. I hate this movie so very much.
(Though I LMAO at the goat)
Quote from: dvorak on March 08, 2010, 08:09:35 PM
I hate this movie. I hate this movie so very much.
(Though I LMAO at the goat)
I feel exactly the same way, including the goat. LMFAO
Just rewatched this riff earlier today and the riff still makes me laugh. Just noticed the goat stampede line for the first time. LMFAO!
I also learned a new thing:
People with filthy nails and horrible teeth still care about others shaming them.
I learned that you can spot an ending from a mile away, yet the image alone can still prevent you from sleeping should you have viewed it at 4:00 AM.
And I agree, there's more ways to kill a goat than just decapitating it.
Quote from: Thrifty on December 27, 2009, 12:39:20 PM
I learned that because of the Evil Dead movies, Sam Raimi has open license to make shitty horror movies and be praised for it.
:clap:
Quote from: Thrifty on December 27, 2009, 12:39:20 PM
I learned that because of the Evil Dead movies, Sam Raimi has open license to make shitty horror movies and be praised for it.
Seconded. I honestly hated this movie and went against my peers' nearly unanimous praise. Thanks to this Rifftrax, at least this film becomes bearable to view.
Other lessons to be learned:
1. Hang outside your boyfriend's (or girlfriend, if applicable) room to listen in on any speakerphone conversation about you.
2. Be sure to attend a Roma wake; there's plenty of food, fun and games to be had.
3. If in a horror movie directed by Sam Raimi, don't presume your ovaries and vulva will save you; if anything, your chances of dying increase.
4. Be nice to Romani people.
Quote from: ShadowDog on February 10, 2010, 04:11:24 PM
I just learned today that super hawt and tasty Ellen Page was originally supposed to play the lead in this movie but had to drop out at the last minute because of a scheduling conflict. (though part of me wonders if she saw the final draft of the script and hurriedly created a conflict. LMFAO)
This movie would have been bearable with Ellen Page as the lead.
Why am I not convinced? Knowing a feminist like her, Page probably took lesson 3 into account after reading the script.
I learned that making a simple everyday business decision is grounds for eternal (and instant, after a 3-day waiting period) damnation.
I learned that if you're an Evil Old Gypsy Woman, you don't really have to live up to your end of a contract, because, hello!, Eternal Damnation.
And I learned that it's possible for an Evil Old Gypsy Woman to live in a sh*thole of a house for 30 years, and still not have paid the damned thing off. And none of the members of the World's Swarthiest Family were apparently willing to help her out with the payments, to save her home.
Quote from: John Bradley on March 08, 2012, 10:03:08 PM
I learned that making a simple everyday business decision is grounds for eternal (and instant, after a 3-day waiting period) damnation.
Yeah,that pissed me off to no end. She makes reasonable decision and gets eternal damnation for it. That would have been the old lady's fourth extension wouldn't it? What bank is going to give that many?