Completely Random Thoughts

[RoninFox]

Nothing quite like stopping work because you discover the dusty filthy shelf your disassembling is direcly under an asbestos covered pipe.

Also nothing like your supervisor trying to convince you that you don't need masks to continue because the only way that asbestos can harm you is if you lick it.  (Seriously, those are her words.)

But masks were found, work continues more carefully.

[Lembach]

Nothing quite like stopping work because you discover the dusty filthy shelf your disassembling is direcly under an asbestos covered pipe.

Also nothing like your supervisor trying to convince you that you don't need masks to continue because the only way that asbestos can harm you is if you lick it.  (Seriously, those are her words.)

But masks were found, work continues more carefully.

1. Sue company for cancer endangerment.
2. Win buttload of money.
3.
3. Quit working and take up decoupage.

[Tripe]

In fact, you can have one of my kidneys if you want.

That would be one of those like for like type swaps there, think I'll pass. Only ever been woken from sleep by a calculus once though, they tend to pick tennis games and the like to make themselves known. 

[ScottotD]

http://www.cracked.com/blog/4-pop-culture-arguments-that-need-to-be-retired/

The only thing I don't like about this list is the fact I can't make the third point my sig on here.

[Danecho1967]

Called a guy to tell him his business alarm is going off.  He F-Bombs me a few times, then hangs up on me.  So I have to call him back, because in between the expletives he said he was going there.  I ask him if he wants the cops, and he F-Bombs me an impressive number of times and hangs up again. 

So I call the police dispatcher (actually, some of the most awesome and professional people I've ever talked to, btw) and tell her, "ma'am I have a key holder en route, I've called him twice and I can only tell you two things about him, his first name, Tad, and his favorite curse word: I can't say it because we are being recorded."

She laughs and says "I'll be happy to tell the officers on scene that he was behaving like an ass.  Oh, I shouldn't have said that..."

I don't have a real problem with vulgarity, but I can't stand unoriginality.  I mean, if your going to use expletives, you might as well mix in some shits, damns, and bitches, or even a cunt if you can pull it off. 

[RVR II]

Called a guy to tell him his business alarm is going off.  He F-Bombs me a few times, then hangs up on me.  So I have to call him back, because in between the expletives he said he was going there.  I ask him if he wants the cops, and he F-Bombs me an impressive number of times and hangs up again. 

So I call the police dispatcher (actually, some of the most awesome and professional people I've ever talked to, btw) and tell her, "ma'am I have a key holder en route, I've called him twice and I can only tell you two things about him, his first name, Tad, and his favorite curse word: I can't say it because we are being recorded."

She laughs and says "I'll be happy to tell the officers on scene that he was behaving like an ass.  Oh, I shouldn't have said that..."

I don't have a real problem with vulgarity, but I can't stand unoriginality.  I mean, if your going to use expletives, you might as well mix in some shits, damns, and bitches, or even a cunt if you can pull it off.

Well shit hell fire! Fuckin fuckers fucked up my day! FFFFFUCK!

[D.B. Barnes]

Holy shit. I just got overrun by a group of about twenty kids. That one mob has decimated my supplies. I wasn't prepared for this! I can't take another hit like that! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!!! SEND CHOCOLATY REINFORCEMENTS!!11!!

[Darth Geek]

Holy shit. I just got overrun by a group of about twenty kids. That one mob has decimated my supplies. I wasn't prepared for this! I can't take another hit like that! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!!! SEND CHOCOLATY REINFORCEMENTS!!11!!

Dammit, and now I can't find a pic of the chocolate candy bar robot squad from the Simpsons.

[Mrs. Dick Courier]

Called a guy to tell him his business alarm is going off.  He F-Bombs me a few times, then hangs up on me.  So I have to call him back, because in between the expletives he said he was going there.  I ask him if he wants the cops, and he F-Bombs me an impressive number of times and hangs up again. 

So I call the police dispatcher (actually, some of the most awesome and professional people I've ever talked to, btw) and tell her, "ma'am I have a key holder en route, I've called him twice and I can only tell you two things about him, his first name, Tad, and his favorite curse word: I can't say it because we are being recorded."

She laughs and says "I'll be happy to tell the officers on scene that he was behaving like an ass.  Oh, I shouldn't have said that..."

I don't have a real problem with vulgarity, but I can't stand unoriginality.  I mean, if your going to use expletives, you might as well mix in some shits, damns, and bitches, or even a cunt if you can pull it off. 

I've always enjoyed the term "suck a mule" myself.  As in oh, suck a mule...

Or "shit a brick"

[Pak-Man]

Halloween went pretty smoothly over at our place. We had EXACTLY enough candy for every trick or treater, minus one bag of Reece's Pieces, which I consumed. I made some kid's day by recognizing his costume as the guy from Minecraft. We watched Frankenstein.

But this is all just a flimsy pretense for me to post up an adorable picture of my son in the costume Tyrant made for him:



Yes, it glows in the dark, and yes, there's a stuffed identity disk that velcros onto the back. :^)

[Tripe]

Educational Curator position at a local Zoo, which more than a month left for applications, so want to get it!

Or, to put it another way:

Spoiler (click to show/hide)

ERMAHGERD ERDERCERTERNERL CERERTER PERSERTERN ERT A LERCERL ZER, WHERCH MAHR THERN A MAHNTH LERFT FER ERPLERCERTERNS, SER WERNT TER GERT ERT!

[goflyblind]

Educational Curator position at a local Zoo, which more than a month left for applications, so want to get it!

you were sure to highlight your internship at the discovery institute, and your belief that noah's ark is entirely factual and that darwin^*'s a ninny, right?



*both of them.

[Sideswipe]

Well no one has ever seen a monkey give birth to a crocoduck, so evolution can't be real!

[Tripe]

There a performance element to the position (writing and staging educational shows and the like) maybe I can get a Crocoduck puppet made…

[Sideswipe]

As long as you name it Kirk, thats all that matters.