Author Topic: Completely Random Thoughts  (Read 1333497 times)

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Offline Russoguru

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18795 on: September 08, 2017, 10:01:12 PM »
I'm so sorry to hear that Lucas. I hope everything goes okay.  :'(


Offline LucasM

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18796 on: September 09, 2017, 05:14:48 PM »
Thank you Russoguru.  One of the biggest aspects that is agitating about it is that it has taken this long for them to finally get him to an oncologist when it was fast-growing two months ago.  Won't know til at least Monday if he'll want me there, or when.  He said when he doesn't feel good he doesn't like anyone around him at all (I'm the same way), so basically, he wouldn't want me there post-chemo, but not sure how much quality time he'll have left where he DOES feel relatively good, if any, after that starts.

IF that starts.  It may be too advanced as it is, as he said on the phone just last night that he thought he found another spot it may be growing, which would suggest it is already stage 4.  If that is the case, they may not feel, or HE may not feel, that any gains by treatment would be worth the hell he'd go through in treatment.  That was, actually, one of the things I wanted to talk to him about in person, before treatment started - now, not an option, apparently.  I'll have to do so over the phone after he gets feedback on it from the oncologist if they don't automatically just jump into it.
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Offline Edward J Grug III

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18797 on: September 10, 2017, 05:14:20 PM »
Sorry to hear this, Lucas. Hoping for the best.
FINE


Offline Russoguru

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18798 on: September 10, 2017, 05:40:18 PM »
Again Lucas I wish you all my best. I can't imagine what that must be like for you.


Offline LucasM

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18799 on: September 10, 2017, 06:13:10 PM »
Thank you EJG III and thank you again Russoguru.

The 'not knowing' is definitely the biggest problem right now.  Personally, when a cancer is so aggressive that it is not visible on the face and two months later is a large lump and affecting speech (as well as potentially being in a second spot on his body), I can't see it being treatable at this level.  [Certainly not enough life expectancy gain to warrant the loss of quality of life.]  So for me the 'not knowing' is 'not knowing when I would be traveling there'.  But for my dad I think he is still 'guardedly hopeful' for treatment/cure, though he, too, is seriously anxious wanting to at least KNOW what he is dealing with.  Underneath I think he, too, knows that with it this aggressive there isn't likely to be much that can be done and I think mostly is anxious with being 'on hold' for emotionally preparing for the end of his life.  And that is part of what I want to be there for.

In my psychology training I learned some of what may be needed or what someone may want to talk about with death issues, so won't shy away from conversations I don't think my brother is capable of having with him.  But since my dad is not a therapy client, I can simply use what I learned as guidelines to help him talk about whatever he needs to with it, at pretty much whatever speed he feels he can handle it.
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, read this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline Russoguru

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Re: Completely Random Thoughts
« Reply #18800 on: September 10, 2017, 09:43:44 PM »
Lucas please check your pm's when you've got time.