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Author Topic: Dave Barry  (Read 2528 times)

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Kzinistzerg

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Dave Barry
« on: August 04, 2007, 07:38:32 PM »
No one appears to have made a topic on him. So, anyone else love this guy and his writings? simply hilarious!

Some samples, courtesy of wikiquote:

"Buying the right computer and getting it to work properly is no more complicated than building a nuclear reactor from wristwatch parts in a darkened room using only your teeth."

"Electricity is actually made up of extremely tiny particles called electrons, that you cannot see with the naked eye unless you have been drinking."

"The only really good place to buy lumber is at a store where the lumber has already been cut and attached together in the form of furniture, finished, and put inside boxes."

"The Constitution of the United States of America, Article V, Section 1: "There shall be a National Anthem containing incomprehensible words and a high note that normal humans cannot hit without risk of hernia."

"The first major president to be elected after the War of 1812 was President Monroe Doctrine, who became famous by developing the policy for which he is named. This policy, which is still in effect today, states that:

   1. Other nations are not allowed to mess around with the internal affairs of nations in this hemisphere.
   2. But we are.
   3. Ha-ha-ha."


Offline Junkyard

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #1 on: August 04, 2007, 07:48:15 PM »
Yeah, I've read nearly all his books. Loved both Dave Barry Slept her eand Dave Barry's Guide to Guys. He's one of the greats.


Offline jedi2187

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #2 on: August 04, 2007, 11:37:57 PM »
Dave Barry Slept Here and Dave Barry Turns 40 are my faves.

The history part I like is the coverage of the Lost Colonists.
"Think!", they'd say, "where was the last time you saw the village?". But to this day, there's still no sign of the lost colony. Occasionally, they'll appear on the side of milk cartons.
" LISTEN KID. I've been hearing that crap ever since I was at UCLA. I'm out there busting my buns every night. Tell your old man to drag Walton and Lanier up and down the court for 48 minutes. " -Roger Murdoch, Airplane!


Offline Junkyard

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #3 on: August 05, 2007, 05:01:16 AM »
The running Nixon jokes made the book for me.


Offline Hebs

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #4 on: August 05, 2007, 12:54:44 PM »
I'm not sure if this is a rare one, but one of my favorites is "Dave Barry Goes to Japan" and his comments on writing kanji are so hilarious. 
He says, "instead of adopting a Chinese character, if you want to write dog, just draw one (insert shitty scrawl of dog smiling) "
.... t w i t t e r  //  b l o g  ....


Kzinistzerg

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #5 on: August 05, 2007, 01:00:00 PM »
You've gotta love his rendition of the sentence, "the nightingale smiled when the dog ate the salesman."


Offline Junkyard

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #6 on: August 05, 2007, 01:12:15 PM »
My Commercials We Hate thread is based directly on his Most Hated Commerical survey. "Snuggle Bear Must Die!"


Offline PlayMSTie

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #7 on: August 05, 2007, 02:34:59 PM »
I've been a fan for many years. If I had to pick just one favorite passage, it would be the section on English majors ("If you can regularly come up with lunatic interpretations of simple stories, you should major in English") from Dave Barry's Bad Habits.

If you've never visited Dave's blog, you really should. It's a great place to hang out with the regulars and waste work hours learn many interesting and important things.  :)
"There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal." C. S. Lewis

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Offline starfighter

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #8 on: August 10, 2007, 03:16:47 PM »
    I'll have to check out his blog. He's still on vacation from his regular column though, isn't he?  Our paper has been running 10-year old repeats for at least a year.  I haven't read the young readers' book he co-wrote yet.   When I first read Big Trouble, I knew that a movie version had to follow, which I enjoyed even though it tanked.  Has he played any gigs lately with Stephen King and Amy Tan?


Offline Junkyard

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #9 on: August 11, 2007, 05:03:05 AM »
Here's a thread I started on that band he's in. No replies as of yet.

http://www.rifftrax.com/smf/index.php/topic,3894.0.html


Offline PlayMSTie

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Re: Dave Barry
« Reply #10 on: August 11, 2007, 01:05:09 PM »
    I'll have to check out his blog. He's still on vacation from his regular column though, isn't he?  Our paper has been running 10-year old repeats for at least a year.  I haven't read the young readers' book he co-wrote yet.   When I first read Big Trouble, I knew that a movie version had to follow, which I enjoyed even though it tanked.  Has he played any gigs lately with Stephen King and Amy Tan?

He quit the regular column, unfortunately. Now he just does books and the blog and the occasional column.

Whenever he has a gig with the band, he or Judi (his assistant) will mention it on the blog.
"There are no ordinary people. You have never talked to a mere mortal." C. S. Lewis

Bring back Bridget!