Author Topic: The Denial Thread  (Read 16536 times)

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Offline daltysmilth

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The Denial Thread
« on: August 01, 2007, 03:40:48 PM »
As the newsmedia has taught us, one of the best ways to get people to believe something is to deny it.  Saying "I didn't do it" is as good as an admission of guilt. 

With that in mind, I propose a new game, in which we all deny incredibly ridiculous and totally untrue things in order to make each other laugh.  I'll start:

Despite what you may have heard, my genitals are not so large that the ladies have nicknamed me "the telephone pole".

I do not now, nor have I ever regularly given songwriting tips to Elton John.

Katherine McPhee has never expressed a desire to see me naked.

I do not have concrete evidence that proves the existance of a historical King Arthur.

I am not next in line for the throne of the King Of The Hoboes.
CROW:  (Sinisterly) The Secret Government Eggo Project...
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"Jason, Chess is a game of chance."
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http://gh.ffshrine.org?r=112104


Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #1 on: August 01, 2007, 04:56:48 PM »
Sounds like fun.


I am not now, nor have I ever been, a pixie.

I don't even KNOW that goat!

I am not the reincarnation of Benjamin Franklin. I wish you vultures would leave me and my family be!



Offline bettertomorrowamy

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #2 on: August 01, 2007, 05:29:16 PM »
I never drink more beer than I want to drink.

My favorite color is not pink.

I do not own a lavender cock ring with Ron Jeremy's autograph on it.

And no, you bastards, I didn't have sex with a Moon Chimp.
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Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #3 on: August 01, 2007, 05:38:22 PM »
I am not secretly Godzilla.

I have never, I repeat NEVER flown on wings made of wax and feathers, and even if I did, I would NEVER let myself fly close to the sun.

I will not vote for mandatory euthenasia of all kids born on leap years!


Offline Sideswipe

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #4 on: August 01, 2007, 08:59:04 PM »
I never said I was the Lord and Master of everything, and I certainly never said I was the King of Riffchat.  Furthermore I never used the movie Army of Darkness quote "Hail to the King, baby,"  As my official Riffchat mantra.

I was bieng threated with death by wolf raping before it was cool!.


Offline Sharktopus

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2007, 12:25:46 AM »
I would like to state for the record that I have never eaten anything that fell on the floor, nor would I even consider it. In fact, I am eniterly unaware of the so-called "five second rule." I have also never dried my hands on my cat in lieu of a towel. I can't imagine how that rumor got started, but it's completely, utterly false, and I take great offense at being accused of such a heinous act. I love all God's creatures and treat them with the utmost respect.

I think I misunderstood the spirit of the game. ;D


Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2007, 04:46:15 AM »
I don't care what the media has said. I don't care what some cheating "eye witnesses" have said. I don't care what the forensics says. I didn't tie a poodle to a model rocket and fire it. It wasn't that- I mean, I imagine it wouldn't actually look that cool anyway.


Offline Hebs

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2007, 07:23:13 AM »
I am perfectly capable of putting down the duckie.  I could do it whenever I wanted.  I just don't FEEL like it.
.... t w i t t e r  //  b l o g  ....


Offline bettertomorrowamy

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2007, 08:42:07 AM »
I will never ghost write a book entitled, "If I Did It".
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Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2007, 08:46:33 AM »
I am NOT insane! 14 floating skulls and a demon-walrus can't all be wrong!


YoohooRiffer

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2007, 10:51:41 AM »
Now the phrase "serial killer" gets passed around a lot these days but I can honestly inform you all that I am NOT one of them.  Despite my collection of femurs and the large number of missing persons reported around my area, no such term as "serial killer" would suit me in the least.  I can't comprehend where people are getting this idea...


Offline Nunyerbiz

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #11 on: August 02, 2007, 11:03:26 AM »
I was not involved with, nor had any prior knowledge of, Junkyard's hiring and subsequent dismissal of a poodle. While I did help him tie the model rocket on... I have no idea why he canned the poor thing. He seemed to be a hard worker... only pissed on trees.... minimal leg humping... shame really. Looked pretty kickass with that model rocket on his back...


Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #12 on: August 02, 2007, 11:40:05 AM »
I have NEVER humped Nunyerbiz's leg. I don't see where he- wait.... (re-reads Nun's post)... ah haha... I mean to say, um, that is.... I have never humped the leg of that man... Nunyerbiz. (Points finger.)


Offline bettertomorrowamy

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #13 on: August 02, 2007, 11:55:29 AM »
I have never posted so much that somebody kidded me about posting too much.
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Offline Junkyard

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Re: The Denial Thread
« Reply #14 on: August 02, 2007, 11:56:35 AM »
Me neither.