Author Topic: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!  (Read 3032 times)

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Offline stethacantus

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List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« on: March 14, 2020, 10:59:17 AM »
Because a lot of people are so stupid they will believe anything, many rumors I am sure were started by online practical jokers have spread faster than the virus. Here are a couple I heard that have made me laugh. ( Remember, a lot of Americans actually believe these to be real. ) 

#Because of copyright issues, the CDC has asked everyone to stop singing "Happy Birthday" while washing their hands, and sing the public domain "For He's A Jolly Good Fellow" instead.

#With the success of the Carona virus, Pabst has announced they will be developing their own virus and hope to have it released by this summer.
« Last Edit: March 15, 2020, 09:29:30 AM by RVR II »


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2020, 09:27:58 AM »
Went to my local Walmart and the TP & Paper Towel aisle completely wiped out..

All the bottled water was cleaned out as well!

Common sense just ain't that common in the world we live in :-[
« Last Edit: March 15, 2020, 09:29:47 AM by RVR II »


Online MartyS (Gromit)

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2020, 10:02:11 AM »
I've read a few articles about people that went around clearing out all their local stores of $1 hand sanitizer and then started selling them on Amazon and Ebay for $50.  They had their accounts closed for price gouging and are now complaining they are stuck with thousands of bottles of the stuff that they can't sell...  Sorry A-holes, you are not getting any sympathy.

Not sure they can be prosecuted because price gouging laws usually don't go into effect until an emergency is officially declared.


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #3 on: March 15, 2020, 01:16:26 PM »
Announced today here in SC, all K-12 schools are closed till the end of the month


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #4 on: March 15, 2020, 04:05:51 PM »
There you go..
Brothers Accused Of Price Gouging Medical Supplies Face State Probe
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/brothers-hand-sanitizer-price-gouging-tennessee_n_5e6e8e04c5b6bd8156f9b763


Offline Pastor of Muppets

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2020, 05:09:22 PM »
Went to my local Walmart and the TP & Paper Towel aisle completely wiped out..

All the bottled water was cleaned out as well!

Common sense just ain't that common in the world we live in :-[

I was at Sam's Club yesterday to get some soda and the paper towels and toilet paper were totally sold out.  There were signs that said "Limit 2 per membership".  Bottled water was still in stock, but I didn't think I needed any.  When I got home my girlfriend told me she wanted some.  I could've turned and gone back, but I was too tired.  When I went today, they had partially restocked on paper towels (but not toilet paper).  I got some vitamin water though; she likes that too.  I'm fine with tap water myself.  She got some filter bottle in the mean time.

When I went to Sam's Club yesterday, the place was packed.  All the checkout lines were super long.  Luckily their phone app will let you scan your purchases and pay in the app, so I got to skip the line.  No such luck on Thursday evening when I went to the regular and very popular grocery store Woodman's.

I hope they lift these stupid rules about public gatherings by the time the Rifftrax Live shows happen in June.
I'm not particularly religious, and I don't really like Muppets, but I do love word play.


Offline linszoid

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2020, 06:13:19 PM »
I'm really hoping for a couple of days off due to the virus.


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2020, 06:22:58 PM »
I'm really hoping for a couple of days off due to the virus.
Actually so am I..
Rumors from a couple of days ago at the post office I work at were that post offices nationwide could be shut down for at least 2 weeks or at the very least the window service (working the counter) where I normally work could be shut down for that amount of time but so far nothing has happened.. If it does happen, we would be paid administrative leave pay during this time off.
As critically understaffed as we are at all 3 of our post offices, this would definitely be a needed rest-bit :o


Offline wihogfan

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2020, 06:33:10 PM »
Went to Walmart last Thursday night to pick up groceries. Yep, they were put of toilet paper and almost all fresh meat. Store just recently renovated and went almost all self checkout (2 lanes have cashiers, but those 2 lanes aren't always open). Had to wait in a long line to get to self checkout. Missed the mini-riot and police being called that happened about an hour later.
Hit Aldi Foods looking for fresh meat at lunch on Friday. They were totally sold out and the checkout line was lined up to the back of the store, so I left with nothing.
Picked up frozen chicken and burgers at a local grocery store early yesterday morning that was also out of fresh meat, so frozen not fresh meat for dinners this week.


Offline wihogfan

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #9 on: March 15, 2020, 06:48:20 PM »
As far as rumors/lies go, there was an article about BS that cruiseline call centers were using to hard sell customers that were pretty despicable- such as it's too hot for the virus to live in the Caribbean.


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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #10 on: March 15, 2020, 09:45:39 PM »
Read a good joke a little while ago.

So, with everyone being stuck at home together 24/7, 2 things are going to happen, more divorces, and more babies....


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #11 on: March 16, 2020, 02:45:24 AM »
<a href="https://www.youtube.com/v/_066dEkycr4" target="_blank" class="new_win">https://www.youtube.com/v/_066dEkycr4</a>


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #12 on: March 16, 2020, 04:45:46 AM »


Offline wihogfan

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #13 on: March 16, 2020, 06:55:34 PM »
Told at work that we should be wearing masks when in public (by corporate office that is located in a different country)...when pointed out that masks (which to be effective really need to be the respirator type and not the surgical masks that you see so many wearing) are impossible to find and that they've been sold out for months we were met with disbelief. This was followed by a stated expectation that someone needed to be assigned to wipe down all door knobs and other common surfaces every hour with disinfectant wipes. Such wipes, sprays, bleach, alcohol, pretty much anything that would work also not available anywhere for purchase and haven't been for weeks. We do have some at disinfectant wipes at work and have been using them to try and wipe doorknobs down once a day, but they'd be gone in a day if we wiped everything down every hour. We'll send someone out shopping tomorrow for some suitable disinfectant and I'm sure someplace they'll find something, but unless they get very lucky it won't be disinfectant wipes. And they won't be wearing a mask.


Offline RVR II

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Re: List CoronaVirus jokes ( and/or dumb rumors ) here!
« Reply #14 on: March 17, 2020, 02:30:58 AM »
No changes so far to all delivery providers..
Mail services including the USPS and FedEx will continue delivering despite coronavirus
https://www.cnn.com/2020/03/16/us/usps-fedex-coronavirus-mail-deliver-amazon-ups-trnd/index.html