The fuck is wrong with some people in the BDSM community? Fiancée and I both enjoy the lifestyle. She's a switch, which, for those unaware, is someone who enjoys both a dominant and submissive role. The person she exercises her submissive side with is alright. I'm not the biggest fan, but I'm not fucking her, so it's all good.
She has set rules for Hana to follow, which is fairly normal. What is NOT normal, or OK, is that when Hana has had trouble following the bed time issue because she's got issues with paranoia, especially at night. Hana tells her this, and the response is essentially "do what I say, or I'll dump you".
That's straight up abusive. Relationships aren't dependent on if someone wholly obeys another person, even if a large part of that relationship is based on Dominant/submissive role play. It reminded me of how Paul treated me, essentially dropping me when I disagreed with his treatment of me. Anyone who says something like that or sees dominance as a tool to get what you want is disgusting. Submission is not a thing to be taken, it's a gift given by the submissive to her dominant. The submissive chooses to become vulnerable to their dominant, and the relationship is incredibly intimate. It's not something to be tossed aside, like an old shoe. The dominant is the tool which allows a submissive to live out their fantasies, and a dominant has to take special care of someone who offers them this. And Hana's dominant threatened to dump her because she didn't go to bed on time. Disgusting
Topic: General Psychology Thread (for non-emergency and long-term issues) (Read 55699 times)