Frank Conniff's Open Riff Night

[Iron Curtain]

I just came back from Open Riff Night at Q.E.D., and this time was at 9:00PM instead of 7:30PM, so that's why this post is later than usual. But I'm here, and Frank attended, so I'll give you the rundown:

I arrive at Q.E.D. at 8:00PM. Frank arrives at 8:30PM, a half hour early. At around 8:50PM, Myka Fox, Frank's co-host for the night arrived, so we could start at 9:00, which we did. The reason for the move from 7:30 to 9:00 was to increase attendance, but it backfired since attendance actually decreased. There were fewer people for Open Riff Night than last month. So that means that Frank and Myka will have to riff with everyone chosen. The first riffer riffed the first half of a 1950's short about trustworthiness. The second riffer; the second half. The third riffer riffed the first half of a 1954 short about manners. The fourth riffer; the second half. Then it was my turn, and I riffed Batman & Robin with Frank & Myka. As for how I did, let me describe it like this: You know that Simpsons GIF with Bart Simpson throwing out a cake that says "AT LEAST YOU TRIED" on it? Imagine you were dealing out pieces of that cake for people to eat. That's how I felt about my performance: neither my best nor my worst, but at least I tried. The sixth and seventh riffers riffed the short about cleanliness that you may have watched in the MST3K episode where it preceded The Sinister Urge. This short was also at Open Riff Night last month.

The winner would receive Frank's new short novella, and watch the last 20 minutes of Starcrash. I remember watching the MST3K episode, but even the MST3K episode was nowhere near as bad as the unedited final 20 minutes of Starcrash. Wow, was it a stinker. Fortunately, Frank's, Myka's, and the winning riffer's (I think his name is Jason) commentary was great, but I still prefer the MST3K episode as it wasn't a slog to sit through.

Oh, and one more thing: Before I left, I talked to Frank if he and Trace were going to do a studio recording for Rifftrax, and he said he and Trace were going to do it "sometime in the future". This is strictly from memory, but my memory is fresh, so…

That's all you get, folks!

[majorjoe23]

That would be awesome if Frank and Trace did some RiffTrax VODs. One a quarter or so would be instant buys from me and would keep their live catalogue from getting too depleted.

[Iron Curtain]

Nota bene: I had a previous recap, but since I posted it on my iPhone as I was traveling on the Subway between stations, Safari said I had no internet, and when I refreshed, my recap was wiped off the input box. So I'm going to recap from scratch and I apologize in advance for my brusque and blunt style:

Hosts were Frank and Mia Faith Hammond. Style is Open-Riffer/Frank/Mia. First two clips are of Baywatch Nights. Third Clip is of the John-Woo-directed Hard Target with Jean-Claude Van Damme. Fourth clip is of Birdemic. Fifth Clip is of Manos, and it was my turn. IMHO, I did terribly. When it got to showing the painting, I even hackishly reused the "Frank Frizzetta of a Frank Zappa" riff that was in the original MST3K episode. When I noted it to Frank, he noted that he could have written that line. Next was the Room with just two open riffers and Frank. After that it was the Riki Oh: The Legend of Ricky. The winner got Frank's Book and the last fifteen minutes of the cheesy 80's BMX racer movie Rad. Many jokes about Lori Loughlin's admissions scandal were made at her expense. In the future, I may see Frank and three other riffers riff Howard the Duck.

That. is. IT. I am outta here!

[majorjoe23]

This may be the best place to post this: Frank tweeted tonight that he's in the hospital and may need open heart surgery. I hope it goes well for him.

[losingmydignity]

Oh, no. Wishing the best for him.

[Iron Curtain]

He was doing so well when I riffed with him. I guess heart problems can really sneak up on you like that…

That being said, he's okay! https://twitter.com/CarolinaDoesOk/status/1140460560930283525