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Author Topic: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!  (Read 6403 times)

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Offline Trekker4747

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What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« on: March 14, 2013, 12:23:36 PM »
I learned that even Twilight isn't beneath the surprise-twist-undo-reboot ending.


Offline Sugar Ray Dodge

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #1 on: March 14, 2013, 07:44:04 PM »
Why couldn't they just use real babies?


Offline Trekker4747

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #2 on: March 14, 2013, 08:19:25 PM »
I think it was to make a CGI baby that had features similar to Bella, Edward and the actress playing child-aged Renesseme.


Offline Sugar Ray Dodge

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #3 on: March 14, 2013, 08:27:19 PM »
I didn't know Aragorn was a vampire bum!


Offline Rainbow Dash

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #4 on: March 14, 2013, 09:16:38 PM »
That they had better Wolf CGI artists in this film than they did for "The Grey"

Which is really sad...


Offline Trekker4747

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #5 on: March 15, 2013, 03:11:34 AM »
Quote
That they had better Wolf CGI artists in this film than they did for "The Grey"

Which is really sad...

That's actually quite pathetic.


Offline ManUnderMask

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #6 on: March 15, 2013, 07:22:39 AM »
I learned that Movie Bob (of The Escapist) is full of shit for declaring that the "action sequence" at the end of this film rivaled that of The Avenger's finale.

No Movie Bob, it did not.
I survived the San Diego Comic Con 2010 Hall H stabbing.


Offline Darth Geek

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #7 on: March 15, 2013, 09:48:28 AM »
I learned that Movie Bob (of The Escapist) is full of shit for declaring that the "action sequence" at the end of this film rivaled that of The Avenger's finale.

No Movie Bob, it did not.
I learned you would trust somebody called Movie Bob.



Offline CJones

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #8 on: March 15, 2013, 10:07:56 AM »
Vampires have house building skills that rival those of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Heck, they even managed to get electricity and plumbing in the middle of nowhere.


Offline MartyS (Gromit)

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #9 on: March 15, 2013, 11:19:40 AM »
Vampires have house building skills that rival those of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Heck, they even managed to get electricity and plumbing in the middle of nowhere.

I just assumed that the electric vampire girl just comes around once in a while and charges up their bambleweenie superX capacitor.  But I may have suspended my belief a bit too far prepping for this movie....


Offline Lemming Howard

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #10 on: March 15, 2013, 11:26:05 AM »
Vampires have house building skills that rival those of Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. Heck, they even managed to get electricity and plumbing in the middle of nowhere.

I just assumed that the electric vampire girl just comes around once in a while and charges up their bambleweenie superX capacitor.  But I may have suspended my belief a bit too far prepping for this movie....

Tom Bombadil was a vampire.
And I'm worse than Hitler.


Offline Trekker4747

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #11 on: March 15, 2013, 06:00:08 PM »
I learned that vampires don't breathe but need to breath in order to smell the odor of their prey.


Offline Sugar Ray Dodge

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #12 on: March 15, 2013, 07:06:19 PM »
Can somebody tell me why this needed to be two movies OTHER than money. I know they did it for money. But, sadly, I can't help but think that this MIGHT HAVE BEEN an OKAY (JUST OKAY) movie if all the "action" had been put into a single movie.

...maybe "okay" is too strong a term. Maybe "narratively serviceable" is better. Not saying it would have been GOOD. Do not misunderstand. But, then again, we wouldn't have had two riffs and possibly THE BEST JOKE OF ALL OF RIFFTRAX HISTORY from Breaking Dawn 1. "WHY?! WHY?! I'll tell you why! --oh, hang on. The movie's starting!" [Movie ends.] "DAMMIT MIKE! YOU MADE US MISS THE MOVIE!"


Offline Thrifty

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #13 on: March 15, 2013, 07:50:49 PM »
I learned that one vampire was around during the American Revolution.


Offline Thrifty

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Re: What. Things. Did. We. Learn?!
« Reply #14 on: March 15, 2013, 09:35:23 PM »
I learned that, if the king of the vampires is afraid that a human/vampire hybrid will threaten the existence of vampirekind, and you have evidence to the contrary, you shouldn't open with that.  Instead do a big, complex mental projection of the future.  That way your shitty vampire movie can have a big battle followed by a "lulz just kidding".