LoC 66 Top 50 80s Movies

[Johnny Unusual]

Revenge of the Nerds

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/yoFJ9M1W4G0" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/yoFJ9M1W4G0</a>

And somewhere, Grandmaster Flash is having a spontaneous nosebleed.

[Starman!]

Pretty in Pink is the definition of life. That movie is why we are all here. To learn from it. Or some such shit.

Good movie though.

[Compound]

... and I just now remembered a film that I would have placed in the top 5 or so of my list.

Blast.

Oh well. Looking forward to seeing Turner and Hooch at #1.

[Darth Geek]

47c. Time Bandits

(33 points, 3 lists of 24, highest ranking: #8 CJones)
Release date: UK, July 13 1981
              USA, November 6 1981

Directed by: Terry Gilliam

From IMDB: A young boy accidently joins a band of dwarves as they jump from time-period to time-period looking for treasure to steal.

My take:
Back before Tim Burton made wierd so very marketable, Terry Gilliam was doing it much more creatively.
I'm pretty sure all of this was in Kevin's head and he just had wierd psychic powers that caused the fire and his parents' deaths.

What have we learned?
 Huge pink bad smelling trees are part of God's plans, and not just pot induced halucinations.
 It's easy to steal things from God.
 Satan has an English accent. I KNEW it!
 Given Terry Gilliam's track record at the box office, he really should have given that old Gypsy woman the loan.
 I'm pretty sure the black chunk in the microwave at the end was Michael Bay's heart.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/AjAX3Ks9yOg" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/AjAX3Ks9yOg</a>



Remake: If Terence Malick could cut WAAAAAY down on the arty bullshit, he could make an interesting version of this.

[Darth Geek]

47b. The Great Muppet Caper

(33 points, 4 lists of 24, highest ranking: #16 goflyblind)
Release date: June 26 1981

Directed by: Jim Henson

From IMDB: Kermit, Gonzo and Fozzie are reporters who travel to Britain to interview a rich victim of jewel thieves and help her along with her secretary, Miss Piggy.

My take:
 Easily the goofiest of the Jim Henson era muppet movies. While it can get a little too nuts near the end, since we aren't really threatened by the criminals, I just love it's balls to the wall fun and craziness. It is also very impressive in that it keeps the large Muppets cast, yet still gives all of them stuff to do.


What have we learned?
 "Sneak out in the middle of the night" is a perfectly acceptable method of payment in English hotels. Try it sometime, it works.
 They let Gonzo handle something as sophisticated as an old-timey bulb camera without incident (aside from minor temporary blindness).
 Rail-thin models make great thieves. Yet they don't show them using their talents of fitting between the bars.
 England and Great Britain are different places.
 The parental lineage of Fozzie and Kermit is FUCKED UP!

Contains one of my alltime favorite fun Muppet songs, Happiness Hotel:
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/K9825532HbI" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/K9825532HbI</a>


Remake: SACRILAGE! Actually, it would be silly to simply remake this specific Muppet movie. But I wouldn't mind if the next movie were a little more zany like this one.

[Darth Geek]

47a. Labyrinth

(33 points, 4 lists of 24, highest ranking: #14 Sicgirl)
Release date: June 27 1986

Directed by: Jim Henson

From IMDB: 15-year-old Sarah accidentally wishes her baby half-brother, Toby, away to the Goblin King Jareth who will keep Toby if Sarah does not complete his Labyrinth in 13 hours.

My take:
A young teenage girl wanders around confused, searching for an older man's package, to get a baby. For kids!


Hey it's been riffed! By Riff This!
http://www.rifftrax.com/iriffs/labyrinth

What have we learned?
 This movie has balls.
 His name is Hoggle.
 I'm pretty sure the Bog of Eternal Stench is just New Jersey.
 There is more abduction in this movie than in Abduction.

The very funny Jewwario as Jareth:
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/VeRVKQN4v0E" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/VeRVKQN4v0E</a>

And because I couldn't find a best of Jareth in Suburban Knights:
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/swWGMxLRKQM" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/swWGMxLRKQM</a>


Remake: This seems tailor made for Eddie Izzard (sans the singing, of course). Directed by Terry Gilliam.

[Darth Geek]

46. Broadcast News

(34 points, 2 lists of 24, highest ranking: #1 ColeStratton)
Release date: December 16 1987

Directed by: James L Brooks

From IMDB: Take two rival TV reporters: one handsome, one talented, both male. Add one producer, female. Mix well and watch the sparks fly.

My take:
I'M AS MAD AS HELL, AND I'M NOT GOING TO-*whisper* what? *whisper* Oh.
Uh...a professional news organization is a lot like high school.


What have we learned?
 This movie seems to have a plot tailor made for a porn spoof.
 Apparently Anchorman is a sequel to this. Or a remake maybe.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/YtGSXMuWMR4" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/YtGSXMuWMR4</a>



Remake: Why? We got Anchorman, and will get a sequel to that in not much longer.

[Darth Geek]

45. Nightmare on Elm Street

(35 points, 3 lists of 24, highest ranking: #13 ScottotD)
Release date: November 9 1984

Directed by: Wes Craven

From IMDB: In the dreams of his victims, a spectral child murderer stalks the children of the members of the lynch mob that killed him.

My take:
You know how people sometimes say "oh, at least he died peacefully in his sleep", well fuck that! Apparently when you die in your sleep you die for real in the Matrix or something.

Hey, it's been riffed! By RoninFox. It even made it on the Top iRiffs LoC:
49   Ronin Fox Trax - A Nightmare on Elm Street   -   BUY


What have we learned?
 Vigilante justice carries no consequences for you, but it might backfire on your kids.
 A killer who only went after pre-pubescent children will come back from the dead to stalk kids in their late teens.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/6el_drIwidQ" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/6el_drIwidQ</a>


Remake: Sure, why not? Maybe hire that cool guy who played Rorschach, and-*whisper* WHAT?!

[Darth Geek]

44b. Withnail and I

(37 points, 3 lists of 24, highest ranking: #1 Tripe H. Redux)
Release date: June 19 1987

Directed by: Bruce Robinson

From IMDB: Two down-on-their-luck actors (Withnail and Marwood) find solace in drink and other substances. Seeking respite from their uneventful lives they escape up north to Penrith to Withnail's uncle's stone cottage. Faced with no modern conveniences, a bunch of oddball locals, and a surprise visit from an amorous "Uncle Monty", their wits are tested, along with their friendship.

My take:
This is a documentary about the Nine Inch Nails, right?
Watch two witless "artists" fail at life. It's a comedy!


What have we learned?
 Apparently this is not a documentary on the Nine Inch Nails.
 Apparently this is also not a zombie movie, despite the setup.
 Apparently this is ALSO not a prequel to Rent, although I am grateful for that.


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/x-QsHopbsSo" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/x-QsHopbsSo</a>



Remake: Have Edgar Wright direct it, starring Simon Pegg and Nick Frost, make it about a zombie apoco- *whisper* I KNOW! I was just kidding.
Make it about the Nine Inch Nails.

[Darth Geek]

44a. Crimes and Misdemeanors

(37 points, 2 lists of 24, highest ranking: #6 George Harrison)
Release date: October 13 1989

Directed by: Woody Allen

From IMDB: An opthamologist's mistress threatens to reveal their affair to his wife, while a married documentary filmmaker is infatuated by another woman.

My take:
It's a Woody Allen film, so...I don't get it.
Martin Landau plays an orthedontist, and despite being 184 at the time of filming and looking like death incarnate, has qualms about killing someone. Oh, and apparently he's been getting some, so EWWWWWWW!

What have we learned?
 No amount of showers is enough after thinking about Martin Landau having sex.
 Blaming an innocent man for a murder you committed is okay, if he is a drifter.

Crimes, Misdemeaners, and Payback:
<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Ear6WEyeISc" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Ear6WEyeISc</a>


Remake: Um...maybe Frank Oz? And Martin Landau is (somehow) still alive, so bring him back.

[Charles Castle]

The "vitriol" was just me trying to be funny based on the silly premise, since for some of these lower ranking movies I haven't seen them. No offense is intended.

I voted for both Fitzcarraldo and Paris, Texas and I didn't take any offense at all. I totally got a kick out of it.

[Darth Geek]

43c. The Elephant Man

(38 points, 3 lists of 24, highest ranking: #6 Johnny Unusual)
Release date: October 3 1980

Directed by: David Lynch

From IMDB: A Victorian surgeon rescues a heavily disfigured man who is mistreated while scraping a living as a side-show freak. Behind his monstrous facade, there is revealed a person of intelligence and sensitivity.

My take:
David Lynch posits an interesting question: What if Paris Hilton's inner and outer beauty were reversed?
This is based on a true account (of an actual person's afflictions, anyway), so the comparisons to Rondo Hatton and his plight in the movies is relevant.
But ultimately this is a movie all about what it means to be "a sideshow freak" of various different society levels.

What have we learned?
 A deformed man raised in a circus show will still have knowledge of sophisticated things
 A renewed appreciation for John Hurt as an actor.
 It is a man, not an animal, even though it doesn't look like any actual animal.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/qKaYaDOyTP0" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/qKaYaDOyTP0</a>


Remake: Oh this has Guillermo Del Toro written all over it.

[Darth Geek]

43b. Stand by Me

(38 points, 4 lists of 24, highest ranking: #12 Smoky)
Release date: August 8 1986

Directed by: Rob Reiner

From IMDB: After the death of a friend, a writer recounts a boyhood journey to find the body of a missing boy.

My take:
It's a Stephen King adaptation, but it's good. Who knew, right?
A bunch of kids go out in search of a dead body, as one is often wont do.
Wackiness and emotional maturity ensues.

What have we learned?
 Whil Weaton IS capable of not being annoying for about ninety minutes.
 Surprisingly, none of these characters grow up to be Herbert West.


<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/Brrc8zh-7B4" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/Brrc8zh-7B4</a>

Remake: I still think nobody directs child actors as well as Joe Dante. Have Justin Beiber play the dead body.

[Darth Geek]

43a. Say Anything

(38 points, 3 lists of 24, highest ranking: #10 mrbasehart)
Release date: April 15 1989

Directed by: Cameron Crowe

From IMDB: A noble underachiever and a beautiful valedictorian fall in love the summer before she goes off to college.

My take:
Forever enshrining "lifting up your boombox while cheesy music blares" in the annals of 'supposedly romantic' history.
The setup for this sounds like that of The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies.


What have we learned?
 Ione Skye is an actual actress' name, and not a porn pseudonym. Still looking into if she is a Nazi from the moon.
 In the 80s, John Cusack could pretty much do no wrong.
 After some experimentation, this technique does NOT work with an iPod.

<a href="http://www.youtube.com/v/11wX2iKCouc" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube.com/v/11wX2iKCouc</a>

Remake: For crying out loud, they used this ending in Night at the Roxbury. It's dead.

[Tripe]

My favourite reuse of audio from Withnail and I (sadly the people at Fox have caused the first in the series, featuring Uncle Vader) to be blocked. 

<a href="http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/v/e3EVuoOo3kA" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/v/e3EVuoOo3kA</a>

<a href="http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/v/MsblDk2h3V4" target="_blank" class="new_win">http://www.youtube-nocookie.com/v/MsblDk2h3V4</a>