Author Topic: The Riff That Got Away...  (Read 12991 times)

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Offline Sideswipe

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #15 on: February 26, 2009, 07:28:12 PM »
someone slap him

I was bieng threated with death by wolf raping before it was cool!.


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #16 on: April 15, 2009, 03:05:55 PM »
In 'The Day After Tomorrow':

 about 62 minutes in, there are noises before the ship pulls up the street into view.  [You really have to hear the sound it makes to get this comment...]

Missed Riff:   "It's wookie opera!"


 about 92 minutes in, and MANY times after, while they are in the lone room, arguing about burning books.

Missed Riff:  "Yeah... we wouldn't want to maybe close the blinds and insulated curtains... it would obstruct our view of the snow through the single layer of glass that is between us and a painful icy death!"
« Last Edit: April 15, 2009, 05:56:05 PM by LucasM »
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #17 on: May 08, 2009, 01:40:09 AM »
I posted these In the "Twilight discussion" area, but figured they might get seen more here.  [The 'voices' I refer to are the tone of the joke, whose style it seems to fit best...  not that I'm hearing voices...  (or not that I'll admit to  ::) )]


@~10:50 Bella walks into Bio class, Edward covers his mouth after she walks over to him there's a point where his mouth is partially open showing that his fangs have grown

MissedRiff:  "Soo... vampires get fang boners when they get horny?"   [I hear this in Bill's voice.]


@~18:35  Bella says, "I don't like cold wet things."  Edward laughs.  Bella asks what's so funny.

MissedRiff:  "Well, when we have sex later its just going to be really disappointing for you."  [I hear this in Mike's voice.]


@~78:06  Edward comes into the house, introduces himself, and shakes Bella's father's hand.

MissedRiff [purely 'practical', not funny]:  They make a Big Deal out of how cold his skin is with Bella just barely brushing the back of one or two of his fingers with one of hers, and the sherriff - trained in observation - in a full-hand handshake doesn't notice the guy's cold and dead?  [I hear this in Kevin's voice.]
« Last Edit: May 08, 2009, 01:43:32 AM by LucasM »
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline Plastic Self-Cleaning Duck

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #18 on: May 08, 2009, 08:00:48 AM »
Empire Strkes Back:

Leia: Someday you're going to be wrong and I hope I'm there to see it.

Riff as Han: Hey, I invited you to the premiere of Crystal Skull....


Offline Raven

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #19 on: May 08, 2009, 11:43:02 AM »
In Top Gun, at the very end when Tom Cruise is given his choice of jobs for saving the day, I thought it would be really funny for him to choose flying a cargo plane full of rubber dogshit, thus rendering the threat from earlier moot.  Not hilarious, but I don't really remember what they went with there.


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #20 on: May 12, 2009, 01:31:14 AM »
Lets go WAY back here... (to an old fave)

MST3K "Space Children".

~62 minutes in:
Film (slightly muffled):  "Go phone the depot... and phone Eagle Point, tell them what happened."

Mike: "Go phone the Devil?"

Crow: "That's what I heard!"

MissedRiff [presumeably Servo]:  "Well, they ALSO said to phone Evil Point, so they're making sure that the Underworld is sure to get involved here!"
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #21 on: May 31, 2009, 01:21:19 AM »
OK... been watching nearly a RiffTrax a day for a while now (I think they actually hold up better than most MST3K episodes).  I've got a small stack of 'MissedRiff' notes I took here for various movies.  I'll add one or two to this as I can.

This entry'll be a 'double feature': Raiders of the Lost Ark and Kingdom of the Crystal Skull.  Let's dive right in...


Raiders:
~7:40  Indy guessing the gold statue's weight.

MissedRiff:  "In what reality does a pouch of sand weigh as much as a solid gold statue twice its size?"


~20:52  Showing Indy in his living room, packing.

MissedRiff:   "Did David Bromstad travel back in time to the early 40s to install electric lights in Indy's fireplace chimney for moody indirect lighting?"


~25:20  Marion introduced.

MissedRiff:  "Whoah!  Marion should hire Indy to search for her missing butt!  Someone stole the entire thing."


~42:00  Truck with Marion in basket being driven roughly 15 feet.

MissedRiff  {faux screaming}:  "Ahhhh!  Multiple dimensions!  The successive scenes each have an entirely different topography!"


~56:20-56:43  Indy operates the theodolite in Egyptian garb

MissedRiff:  "Lets see... a 23 second camera pan covering hundreds of yards of space is all covered by one khadam in height on the staff?"
 [apologies, I can't find the proper spelling of 'khadam']


~62:15  Belloq hands Marion shoes.

MissedRiff:  "Yes!  Stumbling repeatedly because one is wearing high heels on sand is very sexy!"


~69:30  Mike, Kevin and Bill are discussing the titular 'Raiding'.

Kevin (I think):  "Measure once, raid twice!"

MissedRiff:  "Speaking of measure... no-one has seen this ark for thousands of years right?  So how is it that they have a preformed crate the exact size to fit it perfectly?"


~80:00  The 'wing' airplane is gradually being approached by the incessantly spilling gasoline

MissedRiff:  "Gas shortage heck!  All we need is one of those Nazi tank-trucks!  The plane's wing clipped the top of this small fuel truck... and, conservatively, 500 gallons of gasoline have sprayed out of just the top foot of it."


OK.... on to Crystal Skull.

~3:29  Sign:  'Use of Deadly Force Authorized' after the military guards are shot.

MissedRiff:   "It's a good thing deadly force was authorized, or the Russians might've gotten in trouble for killing the guards!"


~11:14  Part of the 'selective magnetism'

MissedRiff:  "Amazing technology they had in 1957!  The wooden box around the mummy case had advanced magnetic shielding, so only gunpowder was attracted to it until the wood came off!"


~15:15  Jeep passes through the huge stack of boxes

MissedRiff:  "That Jeep has incredible inertial characteristics: going 15 miles per hour it was able to shoot through and splinter filled boxes stacked 30 feet tall!"


~23:30   Indy is 'caught' after his fridge escape.  He asks:  "Who was that woman?" (even though they were introduced when standing in front of the Area 51 warehouse.)  The old guy bailing him out gives him a long description of her interests, turn-ons, what-not, then finally says her name.

MissedRiff:  "Talk about the long way around: his superior officer didn't start with her name."


~29:07  "...the name's Mutt...."

MissedRiff:  "Let's see... 'Mutt'... a name for a mixed-breed dog... Jones named himself Indiana 'after the dog'... no bells go off for anyone with all this?"


~81:35  Mutt stands on the moving Jeep and is dragged 20 feet into the air by a vine.

MissedRiff1:  "The loop of vine was a spring-loaded trap?"
MissedRiff2:  "Yes, didn't you know that that breed of monkeys taught Rube Goldberg everything he knew?"


~1:09:40  The skeletons merge

MissedRiff [riffer 1]:  "1...  2...  3... [and so on].   There's only 12!  Indy said there were 13 when they were looking at the ancient wall painting."
MissedRiff [riffer 2]:  "The one they brought back was away from its body a long time... probably went out to take a leak."
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline THE QUEEN!!!

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #22 on: May 31, 2009, 04:57:41 PM »
In IRON MAN when Tony Stark is in his cave a prisoner with the European guy, he's dressed like a hobo and the other guy looks all proper, in a suit. The kept making fun of his hat, but I couldn't help saying, "Hobo Bob and Henry Higgins go spelunking!"
"Kissing is like WiFi. Just get within the general area." ---New Moon RT


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #23 on: June 06, 2009, 11:45:58 AM »
Just a quick one...

The X-Files: Fight the Future

~96min:15secs - Mulder is inside the alien ship and finds the freezer-pod that Skully was brought in inside.  He grabs her cross neclace out of the pile of clothing and turns to leave.

MissedRiff:  "So he didn't think maybe she'd need the clothes that it was sitting in?"
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #24 on: June 11, 2009, 03:04:34 PM »
In Twilight, another one (that I missed the first 3 times I watched it):

~92min 50secs
Discussing Alice's drawing of where she sees James showing up.

"[It's] ...a room full of mirrors...."

MissedRiff:  "Wow: cool!  Jimi Hendrix used to live in there!"
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline THE QUEEN!!!

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #25 on: June 12, 2009, 12:50:07 PM »
this is from the MST "Dead Talk Back"---every time the nerdy Krasner guy says, "Recites the Bible well, can't say the same about his work," I can't help saying, "His WORK doesn't recite the Bible well?" I'm sure they could say it funnier, but it deserved a comment.
"Kissing is like WiFi. Just get within the general area." ---New Moon RT


Offline RockSiren

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #26 on: June 27, 2009, 07:49:38 PM »
In 300, when Gerard Butler is standing with butt in full display looking out onto the moon and surrounding lands from his window...and NO FULL-MOON jokes?

Just a thought...


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #27 on: July 14, 2009, 07:32:27 PM »
OK, it's been a while since I added more here.  I've been taking notes as I rewatch various RiffTrax.

And before we get underway, let me just quote Alfred Hitchcock (from an interview on the Dick Cavett Show from 1972), "Puns are the highest form of literature."  ;D


Voodoo Man

8:45  The female lead appears onscreen.
MissedRiff:  "Wow, a 1940s hybrid: Kate Hepburn and Veronica Lake."

10:06   There was a comment about the 'bag on her head'.
MissedRiff:  "Bag nothing!  She's in the French Foreign Legion!"

11:45  Bill: "No body can stalk and leer like John Carradine... and me of course... I'm a brilliant stalker."
MissedRiff:  "And I've been called 'King Leer'."

13:55  Close up of the cousin's face
MissedRiff:  "She can't quite figure out where her lips stop when she applies that lipstick, can she?"

17:11  The fence is shut after collecting the barrier.
MissedRiff:  "What are the logistics of those bushes?  Are there huge window-box-like planters attached across the bottom of the fence?"
MissedRiff (follow-up):  "Wow... you've put an awful lot of thought into that obscure plot point, haven't you?"

20:00  Bela walking upstairs in decorated robe.
MissedRiff:  "Ah... the hand cutout on the left shoulder!  This robe was an early draft by the 'Betsy Ross' that created Manos' robe!"

20:23  Carradine lets the females out of their cabinets
MissedRiff:  "A little-known fact: zombies inherently know to walk in single file."


The Grudge

35:54  Lines in film:  'How is Karen?'  "She's very shaken."
MissedRiff:  "But she hasn't stirred in a while."

63:35  Rosa Blasi in a red dress.
MissedRiff:  "Since her husband committed suicide off her balcony Rosa's been wearing bright colored evening dresses every day."


Ocean's Eleven

20:36  "Basher's in town."  then they show him saying, "hang on to your knickers..." and being arrested.
MissedRiff:  "They really shouldn't get him... as he's already shown: Cheadle's never prosper!"

58:23  scene shift from Cheadle in muck to the Science Center sign.
MissedRiff:  "Ahhh... the sign suggests that they are going to 'pinch' a pinch?"


This 'cross-RiffTrax' joke goes into both Heroes episode 1, and Grey's Anatomy episode 1
The Heroes version:  ~3 mins in  Dr. Suresh shows up onscreen
MissedRiff:  "That's ironic: the first intern to vote against George's first surgery being successful actually ended up crapping out of the Seattle Grace Hospital program himself and started teaching genetics!"

For the Grey's Anatomy version:  when he first shows up betting against George
MissedRiff:  "I'll bet he's just going to drop out of the program and do pseudo-science genetics like his father!"
« Last Edit: July 24, 2009, 07:13:25 PM by LucasM »
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline LucasM

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #28 on: July 29, 2009, 01:25:25 AM »
OK... a few more (including a golden oldie from 'Mike-era' MST):


MST3K 704: The Incredible Melting Man

16min  The first victim is fishing
MissedRiff:  "That stream is three inches deep!  What is he fishing for, sardines?"

As they appear in various shots (particularly after the General 'drops by' and is hanging around the kitchen)
MissedRiff:  "Hey!  The General is being played by Jonathan Winters!"
MissedRiff2:  "And Doctor Ted Nelson is Bill Bixby!"
   ...then, a bit later, when the general says something Ted doesn't like...
MissedRiff (as Ted 'Bill Bixby' Nelson):  "You wouldn't like me when I'm angry!"


OK... back to RiffTrax...

Spider-Man 2

20:25  Octavius's wife is serving her husband and Peter tea
MissedRiff:  "Oh... my... god!  Round head, bulbous nose, disturbing fake accent... Octavius' wife is Peter's landlord's daughter's mother!"   [really people: take a look at their faces!]

36:40  First solid close-up of Daniel Dae Kim's face, saying, "...successful fusion reaction."
MissedRiff:  "Well I hope Sun doesn't find out Jin left 'the island' without her just so he could help with Octavius's little science experiment!"

55:29  [character says] "There was a disturbance..."
MissedRiff:  "...in the force."

1hr 4min  Harry unmasks Spidey-Peter  "Peter... you killed my father!"
MissedRiff [as Peter doing Darth Vader]:  "No, Harry... I AM your father!  ...Heh, heh, seriously Harry, what's a 'dead father' joke between friends, eh?"

immediately after that, Peter actually says, "There are bigger things happening here than me and you..."
MissedRiff:  "Let's see...  not a simple 'it wasn't me'?  ...not an 'I just gave him a lift home'?  ...hell, not even a Star Wars ripping-off 'no, the Goblin killed your father'?  Nothing?  Just 'this is bigger'n us?  Hell... he deserves Harry turning supervillian and trying to kill him!"

~1hr 5min  MJ is chained up, wet
MissedRiff:  "The wet dress - and apparently cold breeze - result in Ms. Dunst's two bits of 'acting' to make their appearance in this installment."


Spider-Man 3

36:05  After the scene change to the Daily Bugle from Spider-Man saving Gwen
MissedRiff:  "Let's get this progression straight: Spider-Man saves Gwen... talks to a dick photographer... and then leaves without getting the crane under control?"

~78:20  Mary Jane is reading Harry's play that he wrote for her in high school, and asks, "when did you write this?"
MissedRiff:  "He said high school... and yet... it's half an inch thick, formatted perfectly for the theater and bound?!  And Harry's supposed to be a slacker?"
To dispel some of the misconceptions about head injuries you have developed from watching movies and TV, I wrote this: ...Some Information on Head Injury Effects


Offline Plastic Self-Cleaning Duck

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Re: The Riff That Got Away...
« Reply #29 on: July 30, 2009, 08:40:51 AM »
MissedRiff:  "Hey!  The General is being played by Jonathan Winters!"

They did point out the resemblance by mentioning one of Winters' characters, Maude Frickert.